by scootergirl 39 Replies latest jw friends
Just curious if your parents still have contact with you after you have been df'd/da'd. Mine have stood by w/strong convictions NOT to have contact w/me. They have to have some being that I have kids that they want to see (but that is very minimal). I always thought it was a matter of conscience when it came to family.
Maybe I should count my blessings!?!
~Christy
nope.
they "hate my lesbian guts" as my mom puts it.
can't even see my younger siblings or my niece.
katie
Mother hasn't REALLY spoken to me in years.
Father has been VERY guarded--only doing "necessary family business." [8>]
And now, after a huge fight re:Dateline, they have made it clear they won't speak to me at all.
WHATEVER.
Lisa
I have extremely limited contact now, and that is most difficult because at one point in time it was an extremely close-knit family.
When your mother tells you flat out that:
I dont know what happened to you, you are NOT the son that I raised. It is such a shame that you turned your back on God.. where did I go wrong? Your grandfather would be so ashamed.and your brother tells you:
It will be so sad after Armageddon when Pop (my grandfather's nickname) will be resurrected and we will have to explain to him why you are not here. We'll get over it though.Shaming tactics, thats all. They are doing what they have been programmed to believe and conditioned to act. I still love them unconditionally, and have told them so even after being hurt by words that cut to your very core. I suppose Im trying to let my actions show what a real Christian should behave like, hoping that they would wake up someday.
I agree with Lisa...whatever. My wife's parents throw us a bone now and then, but most of the time just leave my wife alone. Which is better anyway. The less controversy, the better.
ashi
Considering the JW's proudly proclaim they are the most loving and happiest people on earth, these experiences posted on this thread surely demonstrate how well they follow Jesus's admonitions.
hey Katie, I sent an email...just wanted to let you know in advance as there's been a lot of sneaky bastards sending virus' lately....
ashi
My 'mother'..."checks in" about once a month...to either guilt trip me for not calling her, or to do what i'd call trying to 'nice me back into the borg'...or to snoop around and try to quench her insatiable curiousity about my sex life. Boy, can I keep secrets! I must drive her crazy. I have to though, she keeps records, FFS. Sometimes she calls when she's in a pissed off mood, it's as though calling me is her own personal rebellion at those times. We don't talk religion. She speaks to me like she has a check-list in front of her that she is ticking the topics off of.
My 'father' doesn't talk to me. Thank gawd. Hell, i'll even thank Jehovah for that one. This has been THE SINGLE BIGGEST RELIEF i've experienced upon leaving WTBTS. Had i known this would happen, i mighta left sooner.
Neither of my step-parents call me. Not that they ever really did. But of all my 'parents' I actually miss them the most.
SPAZ
When I was fresh out of the borg, my JW family backed right off, and I in turn felt that this was the right thing to do and backed off them as well.
But, as time went on I was the one that changed and was in their faces.
My mother has been Df twice and was given the true dub treatment by us kids.
She has developed her own balance on the matter altho it's screwed up at times.
Since my departure my sister Da'd and my brother and other sister are inactive. In mom's eyes we are all out of the "troof", but she maintains and continues contact despite the lifestyles we now have.
An interesting conversation came up between her and my partner's JW uncle & aunt.
The aunt question mom about whether she should have contact with me and my family.
Her response was that the grandchildren aren't Df and shouldn't be shunned, in fact she feels justified in keeping contact with all her kids so that we know the door is always open for any of us to return to the fold.
My mother has her funny ways about things and does not go with the hardline borg mentality on it.
She knows of an elder's wife who regrets shunning her Df son who killed himself many years ago.
Kep
Mine do, and I am grateful for that. It takes a lot of strength to stand against the Tower. I'm proud of them for it. I've lost too many familiy members, the cancer known as the Jehovah's Witnesses has destroyed our once close extended family.
