A question from "Pet," a Lurker.........

Cassiline

Hello All I just recieved this e-mail and this lurker is asking the following questions,

Hi Cassi.

I am not great at anything especially the comp. Dont even know how to link with the site so am an addicted lurker. Could you post this question for me?

How would you feel after being in the "Truth" for 40 years, raising your 4 children born in it and only to find out that you were wrong? One child didnt like it(he is a free spirit), two are out because of injustices they saw meeted out to their good, loving elder father. One is so deeply in she cannot be moved because we indoctrinated her too well.

My husband is ok with our decision but I am still angry and lost. Talk about what I could have become? The sky was the limit but Armageddon was so close it wasnt important.

Would love some hugs and comments from these wonderful board members. I will look out every day for reply if you can post this for me. Ta. Pet.( My lurker name)

C

When the pain of being where we are, becomes greater than our fear of letting go...we will risk and heal and grow.

Cassiline

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ Pet }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I know that you must be going through confusion over your decision to raise your children in the "truth". I have just really started to explore who I am and who I could have become.

So my answer to you will be far off from what many others here on this board can give you. I feel as if I am just learning so I hope that others will have the words of wisdom that elude myself.

C

When the pain of being where we are, becomes greater than our fear of letting go...we will risk and heal and grow.

crawdad2

i cami!

i think the first step in dealing with it all, would be to learn how to post on this forum.

outnfree

(((((Pet))))),

I was only in for 11+ years officially and I felt 'angry and lost' when I DA'd myself in March of 2001. Still am a bit 'lost' and waaaaaaaaaay angry! At myself, at the evil (yes, evil) Governing Body, and at the ways I'm learning things were in reality versus the outside of the whitewashed grave!

Every week it seems like I learn more about just how corrupt the Society is! Envelopes of undeclared income for visiting overseers and Bethelites?!!! Fornicating with the 'wild beast' for TEN YEARS (until the whistle was blown by ex-JWs)? Abhorrent child molestation policies that favor the pedophile over the victim, emphasizing the 'sin' rather than the 'crime'? Room bidding frenzies at Bethel each autumn?!!! and on and on it goes... and that's nothing to do with my PERSONAL reasons for leaving which had more to do with "new light" issues and lack of love!

It takes some time to work through the anger, grief, guilt, etc., etc. After all, we have 'lost a loved one' -- our idealized closed society and lifestyle -- and we are in mourning.

Don't be too hard on yourself and please try to learn how to post for yourself. It would be nice to hear your thoughts on many issues presented here on the board, I'm sure!

outnfree

When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. -- Jonathan Swift

SYN

Hi Pet, hope to see ya soon!

They've been digging in the Euphrates Valley and have uncovered a layer of agrarian culture 8,000 years old, and an older caveman culture. Recently, they reached another layer of fused green glass.

ashitaka

Hi Pet, feel free to email any time....

[email protected]

My parents know how you feel, after having been in for so long. Remember, you're among friends (and other assorted wackos)here.

ashi

dungbeetle

Just a quick correction here:

The 'whistle' was blown on the UN issue first by JW's in good standing. Four Bethelites began years ago, then came Zev and bibleexaminer.

The cause was taken up by Hawkaw, never been JW, and at last by the ex-jw's, I'm thinking Kent and MadApostate, but there are many many more.

This is a very important distinction be4cause this matters to JW's still 'in'.

Someone corrrect me if I'm wrong.

(preparing to duck)

BEFORE YOU TRY AND REMOVE THE STICK FROM MY ARSE, REMOVE THE TELEPHONE POLE FROM YOUR OWN ARSE.

RedhorseWoman

((((PET))))) I was in for 30 years, but fortunately, I left before my child was totally enmeshed in the religion.

The anger and dismay stick around for quite awhile, but they eventually do diminish. Although there is nothing that can make up for the lost years and the lost opportunities, you can be thankful that you still have many years to enjoy living as a free person.

If you can possibly get online, I've found it very helpful to post on DBs such as this. Venting and discussing with others who understand can be very therapeutic.

Sam Beli

Dear Pet,

I can understand your situation better than most because I too was “in” for more than 40 years. I too raised children “in.” Unfortunately, they are still “in,” having married JWs. Their entire family is “in” so they have little room to wiggle.

I was a slow learner; I kept trying to believe that it really was the “truth,” but I kept running up against big problems including unloving and unintelligent elders while the WT was telling me in print how wonderful the elders leadership was; the constant barrage of bragging in the WT literature; the constant references to itself being “God’s Organization;” its over use of the ancient name “Jehovah,” (at my mother’s funeral the name “Jehovah” was used, I’ll bet twice in every sentence on and on for over 30 minutes), along with seldom use of the Messiah’s name. The blood issue hit my family squarely in the gut too.

So, Pet, you are not alone. Come here as often as you like read as much as possible and get yourself comvinced that JWs (WTS) does not equal “The Truth.”

These sites are helpful in getting the TRUTH about “the truth:”

Pedophile issue: http://www.silentlambs.org/

Blood issue: http://www.ajwrb.org/index.shtml

Quotes JWs want to forget: http://quotes.jehovahswitnesses.com/

Bethel news and miscellaneous: http://www.freeminds.org/

Doctrinal issues: http://www.xjw.com/

Scholarly Essays: http://www.geocities.com/osarsif/index2.htm

Current JW News: http://www.watchtowerinformationservice.org/

Please let us know how you are doing.

Sam Beli

"...religion opposes the commandments of Almighty God." Violence by J. F. Rutherford 1938

Carmel

My dear Pet,

I presume you are still younger than I and am wondering what to do with your new found liberty. Personally, I'd spend as little time possible stewing in anger and worrying about time "lost". Make lemonade out of the lemons you've grown. There is literally an unlimited chose of things to do with your life that will be rewarding not only to you but to your fellow human beings, be they JWs or not.

Best of all, you know now that it is your choice and not that of a control freak organization.

Best of all to you.

carmel

A question from "Pet," a Lurker.........

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