I received these from Jan Groenveld - Have a good Saturday!
Did you hear about the teacher who was helping
one of her kindergarten students put his boots on?
He asked for help and she could see why. With
her pulling and him pushing, the boots still didn't want
to go on. When the second boot was on, she had worked up
a sweat. She almost whimpered when the little boy said,
"Teacher, they're on the wrong feet." She looked, and sure
enough, they were. It wasn't any easier pulling the boots
off than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her
cool as together they worked to get the boots back on-
this time on the right feet. He then announced, "These
aren't my boots." She bit her tongue rather than get right
in his face and scream, "Why didn't you say so?" like she
wanted to. Once again she struggled to help him pull the
ill-fitting boots off. He then said, "They're my brother's
boots. My Mom made me wear them." She didn't know if she
should laugh or cry. She mustered up the grace to wrestle
the boots on his feet again. She said, "Now, where are your
mittens?" He said,"I stuffed them in the toes of my boots..."
*********************************************************************
Age Barometer
Count how many you remember...
1. Blackjack chewing gum
2. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water
3. Candy cigarettes
4. Soda pop machines that dispensed bottles
5. Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes
6. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
7. Party lines
8. Newsreels before the movie
9. P.F. Flyers
10. Butch wax
11. Telephone numbers with a word prefix (Olive -6933)
12. Peashooters
13. Howdy Doody
14. 45 RPM records
15. S&H Green Stamps
16. Hi-fi's
17. Metal ice trays with levers
18. Mimeograph paper
19. Blue flashbulbs
20. Beanie and Cecil
21. Roller skate keys
22. Cork popguns
23. Drive-in
24. Studebakers
25. Wash tub wringers
If you remembered 0-5 You're still young
If you remembered 6-10 You are getting older
If you remembered 11-15 Don't tell your age
If you remembered 16-25 You're older than dirt!
*********************************************************************
I AM THANKFUL...
FOR THE HUSBAND/WIFE/S.O. WHO COMPLAINS WHEN DINNER IS NOT ON TIME BECAUSE HE/SHE IS HOME WITH ME, NOT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
FOR THE TEENAGER WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES BECAUSE THAT MEANS SHE/HE IS AT HOME & NOT ON THE STREETS.
FOR THE TAXES THAT I PAY, BECAUSE IT MEANS THAT I AM EMPLOYED.
FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY, BECAUSE IT MEANS THAT I HAVE BEEN
SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.
FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG, BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
ENOUGH TO EAT.
FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK, BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE.
FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING, WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING, AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING, BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME.
FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT, BECAUSE IT MEANS THAT WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH.
FOR THE PARKING SPOT I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT, BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING AND THAT I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION.
FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL, BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM WARM.
FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH THAT SINGS OFF KEY, BECAUSE IT MEANS THAT I CAN HEAR.
FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING, BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.
FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES AT THE END OF THE DAY, BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.
FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS, BECAUSE IT MEANS THAT I AM ALIVE.
AND FINALLY.......FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL, BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.
****SEND THIS TO SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT AND BRIGHTEN THEIR DAY!****