Vi's Essay......

by VioletAnai 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • VioletAnai

    Hi Everyone.

    As I think about all the conversations and laughs I've had here over the last six months, it makes me smile. There are some very genuine, loving people here and I wish you all a wonderful future no matter what you choose to do.

    Although I have had some terrible experiences with the witnesses, I can't ignore what I feel. I love Jehovah and if I have to associate with the WTBTS so be it! I accept their flaws - they are MEN after all (hehe). My only hope is that the Silent Lambs issue makes them wake up and see just how unfair their policies are.

    I'm learning to be a patient person, relying on Jehovah to help me get thru. The bible is a great comfort no matter which version you read - Jah's kingdom promise is dominant in each one. I do not believe he is a cruel God, he created us out of love and I know our suffering hurts him....he has his plan...we're just a little impatient as a whole!

    I still have a lot of questions and doubts and I'm working thru these slowly - mostly with your help. Like: Didn't Job and Jesus prove Jah's sovereinty? If it only took two to mess it up - shouldn't these two have nulified the whole thing? And why is all of humankind suffering for two peoples mistakes - seems heartless to me.

    But then I analyze it...Jah wouldn't want his sovereignty questioned again so he is making sure we never forget what it was like NOT to be under his rule. Remember we have never experienced what it is like to live in a world that Jah governs. The only ones who did experience it were Adam and Eve - they being perfect and couldn't even appreciate or respect his authority.

    Jah never wanted us to know such a vile thing as evil and yet here we are blaming him for all the evils of the world!

    I cannot blame God...for me that's a cop out. I only blame one person for my pain...sick pervert who killed the child in me. And I hold fast to the hope that Jah will fix my pain - Rev 21:4. I have prayed earnestly and hard to him to take the pain of the memories away and I truly feel he has. I don't think about it as much and when I do, the knife doesn't dig in so deep. Reading other accounts deeply saddens me. I wish no one had to suffer the way some children over the ages have!!!!! If I could take all the pain away, I would! How much more so Jah is itching to do it!

    So I have decided to depart from this board. Although I've fallen in luv with a lot of you guys - yer just so sweet - I'll miss you. I can't ignore however, the bitter, twisted individuals who's only joy in life is to put others down to make themselves feel better. It's a false sense of security and I fear a fall is likely soon for them!

    I wish so many of you the best and I will pop back in here every so often to make sure you are all going well!!!

    BitterM: I hope yer still going strong girl!

    Naeby: Smart arse - loveable smart arse - always good for a chuckle, a slap in the face or an arse wiggle

    BeckMelbourne: Luv ya mmmmaaaaattttteeeeee!

    Lilacs, Dutchie, Flower, Imbue, Plmkrzy, Celia, Celtic - yer sweeties - please stay that way!!!!

    DakotaRed: Thanx for the help! that goes for you too Yadirf, Teejay, Marilyn, Syn, Hyghlandyer.

    Dungbeetle: Try not to read too much into things (goes for my posts only!)

    Gilwarrior: You're in my prayers. I hope your depression doesn't get the better of you. You're a lovely guy and deserve only the best the world has to offer!

    AGuest - thanx for your point of view - very refreshing.

    ButalBee: Girl...I love that mouth of yours!

    Farkel: You know I luv you too! Thanx for pulling me up now and then!

    Ok....take care everyone and I wish you all the best.

    Luv Vi.

  • Billygoat

    I'm sorry to see you go Vi! It's our loss, but please "pop" in now and again. Take care!


  • Marilyn

    Hi Violet, I think you are doing the right thing. I see this as moving in with a guy before you commit to marrying him. The only way to find out what he is really like eh? I'm confident that you have a good head on your shoulders and that once immersed in the Troof you will see the problems for yourself. I myself always had to learn the hard way. You'll be OK! Just one little piece of advice;

    Bite your tongue every time you feel the hypnosis dragging you under deeper - so you will be able to remember reality.

    seriously - warmest wishes

  • Imbue

    Violet..I wish you well. The JW life works for some people and they are happy in their existence with in mental walls of the WT. I hope you find happiness and peace.

    If it doesn't work out you know where to find us! we'll talk!

    "The only good elite are dead elite!!"-Naeblis
    (Ok! He borrowed it)

  • Valis
    Although I have had some terrible experiences with the witnesses, I can't ignore what I feel. I love Jehovah and if I have to associate with the WTBTS so be it! I accept their flaws - they are MEN after all (hehe).

    That is the dumbest goddam thing I have heard all day. Takes more than MEN to support the WT my dear, and it doesn't suprise me one bit that you end up being one of the weak minded women who support the "MEN after all" class of assholes who operate as JWs....

    Today's word boys and girls is flummery!


    District Overbeer

  • VioletAnai

    That is why I'm leaving this board...examples like Valis...I don't wanna argue...I'm not dumb...I'm a strong woman who would neva let a MAN get one over me again!!!!!!!!!

    It was a joke btw....that's why the hehe is included...

  • Mulan

    So sorry, Vi. I hate to see them suck you up. You don't need a group of people, to worship God. Especially not them.

    Marilyn (aka Mulan)
    "No one can take advantage of you, without your permission." Ann Landers

  • Valis

    OK, lets not argue. You stop making declarations of leaving and lets call it good. Make good or shush....

    Do I think you are dumb? See below....

    Not dumb, but addicted to a concept of spirituality that has left so many bankrupt and in need of real help. Eh, haven't you gone back to the Hall yet? Have you called for the Elders to come and speak to you and help you change your attitude towards one of mildness? Be strong or whatever, hovah good time.


    District Overbeer

  • DakotaRed

    Vi, my warmest and best wishes to you and your future. I sincerely hope that things work out for you and they treat you like they should. If not, we will always be here.

    My email is always open to you if you need a friendly uncle to talk too.


  • Hmmm

    I respect your decision. At least you'll be one of the few JWs who actually listened to both sides before making a decision.


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