How to capitalise on recent unwise appointment with my wife.

by disposable hero of hypocrisy 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • disposable hero of hypocrisy
    disposable hero of hypocrisy

    A brother was appointed recently in the cong, he's got a dodgy history, doesn't really have the respect of many in the cong. It's surprising to me, but I don't really care, good for him. My wife, on the other hand, is ANGRY! she's lost respect for the body for appointing him. I want to capitalise on this, and help her think about the 'spirit appointed' process, but if I bring it up directly I'll just blurt out "see, no spirit appointment here, it's a crock!", and she'll shut down..

    Me bad with words. Me need help. What sort of questions do you think I could ask, any help appreciated!

  • The Searcher
    The Searcher

    "Why do you think the Holy Spirit appoints Elders and Ministerial Servants who are clearly not "free from accusation?" (1 Timothy 3:10)

  • alanv
    alanv

    The link below shows the socirties view of being appointed by holy spirit. However any appointment is based on what the person appears to be, not necassarily what is in his heart. So it is perfectly possible for a sex abuser or someone with an undesirable trait to be appointed.

    http://wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/2001049

  • NAVYTOWN
    NAVYTOWN

    Ask her: Do you think his appointment was guided by Holy Spirit, or was it strictly men who made the decision?

  • Slidin Fast
    Slidin Fast

    Tricky, of course there is no pretence of Holy Spirit being involved any more. The CS does the appointment, it is no longer rubber stamped at Bethel, they are not even informed. I think the way to go is to drop little facts like those in and let them fester. Incidentally we had one poor sod appointed as an elder and then removed within 10 days. Not much evidence of spirit there.

    You don't have to mention the HS, just the new system fo appointment , let her work it out for herself. She may tell you what you are trying to tell her.

  • disposable hero of hypocrisy
    disposable hero of hypocrisy

    Thanks searcher, but if I said that, she'd presume I was being sarcastic as she knows full well I've got serious doubts..

    And slidin', I figured that would be the way to go, I know it's a long game, but I'm getting impatient! I've already dropped in the change of arrangement, but I'm always trying to think of conversations we can have where I don't come across as a negative 'subverter of faith'.....

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    Don't challenge anything.

    Just ask questions.

    Struggle with trying to understand how that can happen.

    Is the HS not with your congregation?

    Doc

  • steve2
    steve2

    Be paradoxical. Say, "Honey, you're right to be mad, but honestly, this sort of frequent occurrence is best left in Jehovah's Hands, even if it does make the organization look as dodgy as the churches of Christendom."

    Then change the topic pronto.

    No one likes having their nose rubbed in "See-I-Told-You-So" dialogue.

    A paradoxical sprinkle here and there is more digestible than a full-on exchange. You want her to calmly think things through - something she cannot do if you fire even well-meant arrows in her direction.

  • sparrowdown
    sparrowdown

    You could try going over with her a list of possible explanations for this "operation of error" of holy spirit.

    For eg:

    a) holy spirit knows this bro better than you

    b)holy spirit got it wrong

    c) holy spirit is not involved in the appointment of elders.

    d)this is an ordinary guy that has been given a promotion by his buddies, not holy spirit

    This may help her to think critically, without spooking her too much.

  • cultBgone
    cultBgone

    Steve2 gives terrific advice.

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