Cognitive Dissonance and my JW Mum!

by lurkernomore 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • lurkernomore

    So, my Mum is a MASSIVELY obedient little dub! I knew this before showing more negativity towards the Borg. I recently fell into the trap of shooting my mouth off about all the things that i felt were wrong with the Borg, after her ass kissing comments got the better of me.

    My other half's Grandmother has also learned TTATT over the past few months as has most of her immediate familly in fact. She calls every so often and always tries to keep us in the loop of new 'developments' she has heard about. I'm sure one of her sons is on here somewhere ;)

    She phoned us last week to inform us of the fact that there will be an announcement in the 1st week of September to ask for 'MORE' money from the R&F, this time to build the new Bethel faciities in the UK. I hadn't heard about this yet so was waiting to hear my darling mother blab on about it when she next pops over to see her grandaughter.

    Low and behold just as expected she mentions the new pledges that were asked for at the Thursday meeting. At this point she has already spouted off for minutes about some other boring and pointless information about the Borg. As you can imagine by this point i had already heard enough and made my feelings known about this so called arrangement.

    Now here's where the Cognitive Dissonance really came into play. She states that she admits she didn't really like the idea of it when she first heard it. I jumped at this and reminded her of how the Borg always said: ' We will NEVER ask for money like evil Christendom'

    You should have seem her face. Something ticked over and you could see her thought process kicking in, only to then make her come out with the the following statement 'But i do suppose that when Solomons temple was being built they all brought their valuable things'

    This is the same BS they go on about for normal contributions for goodness sakes!!!

    I left her with the sentiments of Luke 14:28-30, which plainly sets out the principle to 'calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it'.

    I said clearly they did not calculate the cost but instead hoped the R&F would once again cough up the money for yet another building project. Surely the sale of prime property on London would easily cover the cost of the new build what with the free labour and all.

    It's so frutrating because she clearly has issues with certain aspects of the 'truth' but always finds some circular reasoning to answer away her negativity. I know others have come across this in their dealings with die hard dubs, but just wanted to vent i guess.

    I'll have to learn to hold my tongue better as we've now gone cold turkey from meetings for the best part of 3 weeks now. Wish us luck

  • Coded Logic
    Coded Logic

    A lifetime of belief can't be knocked over by a single good arguement. But sometimes it can be the first rock that gets the avalanch going.

  • bigmac

    ask mum why they are building a new HQ when big A is soooo close---ask her if she really believes it is. her reply could be interesting.

  • lurkernomore

    Hi BM, my wife brought that arguement. She said why when EVERYONE is saying we are soooooooo close to the end do they need to build another bethel when they have a perfectly functioning one in London?

    Apparently it's because the UK is now supplying literature for all these different places and need more printing space. I didn't bother bashing my head against a brick wall by mentioning the sell off of numerous bethels around the globe which could easily be used to finance this build!

    She also happened to mention all the unrest in the world as proof of just how close we are. I said i'm sure it was the same during the cold war. What about the atrocities commited in the likes of Bosnia and surrounding countries. That was just as bad as what IS are getting up to now!

    @coded logic - i totally understand what your saying it's just frustrating because she's always been a know it all in everything, which has always ground my gears ;)

  • Oubliette
  • millie210

    I think sometimes with older ones it is nearly impossible for them to think about things clearly.

    Life at that age gets to be about comfort, really. They like their routines and for things to stay the same.

    Who wants to let go of the structure? The social support? The "hope" that it is all true?

    So what if you leave your group, leave any chance of "hope" just to be alone and lonely and "right"?

    How is that appealing?

    The above is what I am guessing older ones feel, so that determines what they will "think".

  • lurkernomore

    The funny thing about all this is it only took an invite from my gran in Germany for her to join us for my grans 80th birthday party lol

  • passwordprotected

    I remember not long after my exit quoting something to my parents from the Proclaimers book. My mum responded by sarcasticly asking my dad, "and how old is the Proclaimers book?" .

    JWs are the best at finding any excuse to cover for their religion's hypocrisy and double-standards.

  • jookbeard

    some ridiculous lame excuses being spouted by them, more printing ! are they sure? do they realise the amount of branch closures? there is less printing being done now then ever, I take it the property fund from the Crooklyn property sales that must be close to a billion $'s dose not make any difference to them?

  • lurkernomore

    I doubt very much the ordinary rank & file JW knows anything about the worldwide branch closures. Oh and don't get me started on the money made by the sale of Brooklyn properties. I read an article just a few days ago posted on the ex jw reddit page, from the Warwick observer. There it reads that from an estimated $1 billion sale price they're only reportedly looking to spend just over $11 million building the new HQ!!!! That's $989 million left over!!! mean how much more obvious can it get that it's all about the money. Yet they're still asking for money for the UK relocation programme

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