by monis1 36 Replies latest jw friends
The faith of the Jehovah's Witness is entirely emotionally based. Based upon a combination of Love and Fear.
Love of the idea of Paradise, and fear of losing that in the life to come, and family and friends in the life now.
A House Built on ..... yea you got it.
I saw an example of this in September 2001.
Suddenly the hall was full. All these people rolling up. But then, 2002 came and slowly things went back to normal.
As Besty like to say, they're an end time cult with out an end time.
Fear of dying at the big A is all they can trade on.
I remember quite a few returning after the Sept 11 hysteria...but they left fairly quickly when armageddon didn't materialize. Sadly a few stayed on.
Steve2's alcoholic analogy is quite apt, as it can take multiple attempts before "sobriety" becomes a more permanent state. This quote from Heather King struck me as the summation of jw-life: “I once heard a sober alcoholic say that drinking never made him happy, but it made him feel like he was going to be happy in about fifteen minutes." Jdubs stick to the cult NOT because it brings them happiness, but because it promises to do so in the future. They totally miss the point that they can be truly happy NOW! But not when stuck in that soul-killing state of Waiting For Happiness In Paradise.
Here's wishing Sobriety From the WT Cult for all those still-in. Get out of her, you people!
I attempted to go back during the memorial and special talk. Everyone was asking me was I back for good. I said of course I am! I stayed in for 3 weeks, before I realized what I was missing. I enjoyed sleeping in during meeting days.
Peaceful activism helps three groups:
(1) Non-JWs: they need to be educated that the Watchtower movement is a cult and give them the other side of the story, rather than “nice people” the image presented to them.
(2) JWs who want answers: they see something that has troubled them deeply and they’ve tentatively taken a step outside the fence looking for answers. This phase can be temporary if they encounter the “angry, bitter apostate” that Mamma warned them about. They will bolt at the rustling of a leaf. But sometimes they encounter something that strikes the right tone and they stick around.
(3) Inactive, DFed/DAed former JWs: so many of these are not awake. Some might walk around feeling like the specter of Armageddon looms over them. Some are just as afraid of “apostates” as any JW.
I don’t think we do enough to reach out to Group #3.
Last night I was watching the show Amish: Out of Order. I couldn’t help drawing parallels. Even some ex-Amish go back for many of the same reasons…mainly getting their friends and family back, not being able to fit in on the outside.
There is an old saying popular with attorneys: "You can't unring a bell". Being on the outside, visiting pages like this, and talking with other "heritics" is always remembered.
Most inactive attend for only a few months to a year before remembering WHY they had to leave in the first place. The Governing Body just can't seem to help themselves from spouting new non scriptural, mean spirited, mumbo Jumbo Lies.
When you get away from a difficult situation, it can become simplified and even romanticised in your mind, leading you to go back to give it your best shot.
However, once back, reality sets in big time and you realize the same old barriers to acceptance remain.
It's spookily akin to people whose intimate relationships are endlessly off-then-on then off again and so on. Some perfectly normal needs are being accommodated - but if the needs are in conflict, people commonly cope by oscillating "between" the needs.
The two needs that seem to have the greatest push and pull on those affiliated through family with strict religious groups are, firstly the need to have a safe and secure place of belonging and secondly the need to critically appraise one's beliefs.
These two core human needs are vulnerable to being in opposition. The former is deeply emotion-based, the latter, cognitive and concerns making sense of what one is asked to believe.
It is clear that, if your connection to the group is primarily through family and especially parents or spouses, your ability to get your cognitive needs met will be sorely tested. In contrast to what one's religious leaders intone, problems with belief are not "settled" through discipline and threat. As a result, yo-yo-ing occurs. Very human indeed. I suspect that, were it not for these ties and bonds, kingdom halls - and, to be fair, meeting places of many strict religious groups and institutions - would empty very quickly.
Going back to get one's approval needs met is understandable I suppose - but it's a hell of a tortured way to live one's life.
