Black sheep of the family-my life as an ExJW (page 3)

Comatose

Nice to meet you. I'm sorry you are going through this. It isn't fair. It's wrong. Hang in there.

OMG first off, thank you guys for reading my story....I didn't realize how LONG I had made it, lol. I just started typing and didn't realize I was going on and on and on, so really thank you, from the bottom of my heart, to everyone who took the time to read my story.

I truly wish I had found this site in my earlier years. But I'm glad I found it now:)

I am also extremely grateful for all the advice I've gotten from you all and the well wishes. Frankly, I think that's what was holding me back for the last couple of months...I really didn't know how I was gonna handle this situation with my mom. I've always taken the "high road" because well, I'm a walking testament to the new beliefs I took on after I left the JW's and felt like if I made one wrong move they would all be like "Psshht, and she's a Christian? this is what she left the organization for?". But I think essentially I have also turned myself into a walking doormat in certain situations so everyone's suggestions have really put things in perspective for me. I will be writing a letter to her and I'll update here what happens.

The phone call she made was on January 21st of this year. Since then, it has been like she said...no phone calls, texts, or visits.

At this point, with a lot of encoragement I've gotten from people just like me, I feel like this weight has been lifted off. I'm seeing things a little clearer and seeing them for what they are.....it was not my fault. Things happened the way they did and looking back, as painful and lonely as it was, I would change very little. And even though I was disfellowshipped at such a young age, the way I really see it, I THANK GOD I did. It was the moment that catapulted so many of my strengths, qualities I didn't even know I had, and made me the person I am today. I certainly now will shift my entire focus on my education and even more so my children. My son is about to turn 13 next week....I cannot believe me at 13. And I see the same strengths in him and my daughter thus far. My past may have been dark, but my future certainly has been blessed with real "new light"

bsand20

problemaddict I sure will :)

LisaRose

I Think that you did very well. Your young self may not have had all the answers, but your actions set you free. I think sometimes our authentic self steps forward and takes control, sometimes against our "better" judgement, and in the end you got to move forward in your life and be who you needed to be. I was 45 before that happened to me, so pat yourself on the back, you did good!

smiddy

bsand20 , Welcome to the forum , glad to have you on board , your story may encourage others who have gone through similar experiences to break the shackles that bind them .

I find it amazing , no terryfying really , that young teenagers and in some cases pre-teens , once they have been baptised are held accountable for their actions as if they were mature adults , and then treated in this despicable way .

Surely this is nothing short of child abuse , using freedom of religion as an excuse to condone it.

I wish their were some way to make this abuse more widely known in the community , govts., child welfare depts., politicians , the media , petitions whatever , wherever you live in the world this should be exposed . If anybody can come up with a great plan to do this , then count me in.

smiddy

Xanthippe

Welcome bsand20 and thanks for sharing your story. Sorry your family have given you a hard time but I can identify with it, mine have done the same to me. I agree that it it soooo worth it for the freedom, never going back!

RagingBull

They (JWs) must cut off any DF'd ones altogether. There can be NO COMPROMISE!

This sounds non-beneficial for an organization bent on gaining members and in turn, money. You would think they'd admonish some form of communication with DF'd ones in hopes that they will come back to the love. Noooooo, not anymore (if ever).

We live in an age of technology, information...and the revealing of new truths that debunk scientifically, many things the WT needs in order to keep their memebers. Those who are DF'd, or Disassociate themselves, or become Apostates must be kept OUTSIDE and those INSIDE must not communicate AT ALL with these persons. Anyone who is not currently active COULD BE FINDING THINGS OUT about the org...and that knowledge cannot be imparted to their members no matter what relation you may have to them. This is a test of loyalty. They cannot AFFORD to lose members due to the uncovering of scandals and so forth.

You know something is wrong because they try so hard to keep it under wraps. Try so hard to not "debate" matters with anyone. If it is the TRUTH, it could stand against so-called "falsehood" couldn't it? hmmm...

KateWild

Wow what a story. Thanks for sharing. It was so nice of your mum to ignore the DFing policies for so long. As a mother I know, it will be her loss more so than yours. She will miss your kids and want to have association with them.

I would never shun my kids, it's such a shame when the cult takes over. But my circumstances are totally different to yours. Your story brought me to tears.

Kate xx

Black sheep of the family-my life as an ExJW

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