Queen Mum's Book of Condolences

by PopeOfEruke 1 Replies latest social humour

  • PopeOfEruke
    PopeOfEruke

    Real messages in the Queen Mother Book's of
    condolences

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "I think that the Queen Mum and Princess Diana are
    our very own Twin Trade Towers. At last we can look the
    people of New York in the face".

    L.Ward, Mansfield.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "When Diana died I swore I would never smile again,
    but eventually I did.
    Now the Queen Mum has gone I vow that I will never
    smile for the rest of my life, but I will probably break
    that one too".

    A.Christie,Hendon.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "She was one of the old school, all the remaining
    royals are shít"

    J.Clement. Grantham.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "I thought she would never die, she has let us all
    down very badly"

    D.Holmes, Somerset.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "She was a trooper and she never gave up. I remember
    one time she was visiting a school and I asked her if she would
    like to make a visit to the cloakroom before she left. 'No' she replied, 'I didn't give in to the Nazis and I won't give in to the bladder'. That's how she was, a fighter, who refused to be beaten by anything. She píssed herself later though, it was sickening".

    B. Forrester, North Yorkshire.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "She was a marvelous woman, and a wonderful lover".

    L. J.Worthington, Penrith

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "I am absolutely devastated, at least we could have
    got the dayoff".

    S.Wilson, Bristol.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "How refreshing to be able to mourn the death of a
    member of the Royal family without being accused of being
    homosexual".

    J. Fletcher, High Wycombe.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "Her death should act as a warning to others who
    think it is cool to experiment with drugs".

    E. Franks, Cheshire.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "On behalf on all blacks, I send the sincerest
    condolences".

    T.Watson, Ilford.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "Perhaps if we automated her old golf buggy it could
    still drive around The Mall on its own and bring pleasure to the
    tourists".

    Y. Howell, Slough.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "Once again the Queen is not upset enough for my
    liking, the woman should have a bit more compassion, how would she feel if it was her mother?"

    W.Waugh, Richmond.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "It is such a loss, God has shat on our heads".
    K. O'Neil, Inverness.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "I am sure the Queen Mum will not let this setback
    put an end to her public duties".

    N. Wallace, Swansea.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "I hold Princess Margaret in no small way responsible
    for this terrible event"
    E. Thompson, West Lothian.

    ---------------------------------------------------------

    "Bomb Iraq for us Tony, its the only thing that will
    make us feel better"

    P.McGregor, Southampton.

    ---------------------------------------------------------

    "We must do all we can, send blankets, food parcels,
    jumpers, anything to help these brave souls who are
    queuing up to walk past her coffin".

    R. Thompson, Bath.

    ---------------------------------------------------------

    "I have been unable to masturbate for five days, and
    will not do so again until her majesty is buried"

    E. Gorman, Derbyshire.

    ---------------------------------------------------------

    "Good God, who is next, Geri Halliwell?".

    R. Combes, Romford.

    ---------------------------------------------------------

    "No matter how she felt, no matter the situation, she
    always wore a smile. Just like a retard"

    G. Hollins, East Sussex.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "Whichever way you look at it, it just is not as
    exciting as Diana".

    G.Williams, West Midlands.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "She was one of us, and by that I don't mean she
    perpetrated insurance fraud or lied about expense
    claims. She was like us in a good way. God bless you ma'am".

    L. Weller, Harlow.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "If only I could get my hands on that fish bone right
    now, you heartless bástard!"

    J. Hedges, Cowdenbeath.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    "She had such a difficult life, always battling
    against adversity and misfortune. Let us hope that if there
    is a next time round she is given a life of privilege and comfort"

    T.D.Wainwright, Hastings.

  • Klaus Vollmer
    Klaus Vollmer

    England without queen mum
    is like a bottel gin without content

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