GOSSIP In the Kingdom Hall

by Sunflower1982 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • cornish

    Because witnesses generally feel that they are not quite and don't quite measure up to the watchtower superficial measuring rod, I think it makes them feel better if they slag someone else off so that least they can feel comfortable that someone else is worse than them.
    Also I think that many Jehovah's witnesses are just plain bored deep down in side because decisions are made for them and they are trapped in a monotonous routine, they cant joined sports clubs or get heavily involved in hobbies etc,they keep hearing the same old recycled trash at the meetings so a bit of gossip is one of the highlights of their life.

    it was a dreadful shame when witnesses would pour out their hearts in meetings with Elders and the elders could not keep confidential information heard at judicial Committee meetings to themselves, poor trusting followers having their trust betrayed.

    I can remember so often my father almost as soon as he had heard something at a judicial meeting or whatever couldn't wait to ring up my brother and gossip about it with a tone of real excitement in his voice, yes I heard it all and it was all supposed to be completely confidential. One elder spoke about a certain sister by name in tears at judicial Committee meeting, little did she know about her emotional ordeal becoming the subject of the town. I can remember so often that if I went somewhere for tea or anything the evening would practically always end up with individuals being slagged off.

  • target

    Elders have the right to gossip.
    When it came to the attention of the PO, Brother L, that Elder S was repeating everything to his family that went on at Elder meetings and Elder S's children were repeating it out in service, Brother L confronted Elder S with no results. He then contacted the CO who it seemed was in Elder S's pocket. Elder S knew a lot of important JW people. Next, Brother L contacted the Society about the matter.
    The result was the Brother L was no longer the PO, no longer and elder, no longer had any privileges and since it was a small town with only one congregation, Brother L ended up selling his house and moving to another town. This was all because he tried to do something about the gossiping habits of another elder.


  • Elsewhere

    Ahh yes! You will know them by their fruits!

    "As every one knows, there are mistakes in the Bible" - The Watchtower, April 15, 1928, p. 126
    Believe in yourself, not mythology.
    <x ><

  • DanTheMan

    Good post topic.

    I can remember a service meeting I was at about a year ago, a part was done on gossip. And the brother who gave the talk, his family had one of the worst gossip reputations of all! In a way, he kind of admitted it during his talk, too, which was refreshing. I liked him, he was a third generation dub, all of his family and extended family are dubs. I can't see how he could ever even begin to think any other way than the WT way. I wouldn't try to pull him away, he is a lifer and for some it seems better that way. For his family, it is a social club as much as anything else to them, and when all your family are dubs, it is a whole lot easier to swallow all the bull and never question it.

    In the small-minded, insular world of JW's, what else are they going to talk about during their social gatherings & invisible ministry? Trying to get JW's to not gossip is just not possible.

  • Room 215
    Room 215

    Gossip is indeed rampant in the JW culture. And despite their strenuous protestations to the contrary, elders are often the worst offenders, followed closely by the pioneers.

    I'd like to know what percentage of elders involved on judicial committees actually have the integrity to keep from discussing these proceeding from their wives.

    Then too, the JW paranoia about guarding against unwholesome associations (how often have you heard ``that's not just ``wordly'' people; you ALSO have to watch your associations at the Kingdom Hall''?) is a contributing factor.

    So is the Urban Legend witch-hunt mentality; you know: the crackpot notion that says that slow-to-no growth or even decrease in a congregation is a sure sign of someone's `secret sin'' that ``hinders or blocks the spirit's flow.''

    What a relief to have been emancipated from bondage to such a mind-set!

  • bluesapphire

    Yeah, I remember being the VICTIM of the gossip!

    When I got involved I was this pretty, young little thing with an abusive husband and three little baby girls. Of course, everyone love bombed me and felt sorry for me because of my "P-ersecution" with a capital "P" by my unbelieving mate and family.

    As long as I was dragging my little babies out in service during the week people would buy them "service shoes and clothes" because my P-ersecuting husband refused to do it.

    I loved to go out for coffee after the meetings with the friends and service at least gave me something to do since I had no life.

    I remember I felt soooo loved by the "friends."

    I didn't know that I became the "topic" when I wasn't around.

    I guess some sisters were jealous because their husbands used to pay attention to me and the young brothers used to like to hold my babies in their laps during meetings LOL. One brother got counselled because he pushed my stroller.

    I don't know when I started getting the "evil eye" from sisters when I had to walk to the back because my eldest had to go pee during the meeting. Or when I would be at the service desk and the brothers behind it tripped all over themselves to say something "witty". I was all smiles. But boy could I feel the evil stares!

    Then came the "well-meaning" comments, "Why don't you sit in the back?" "Why don't you spank your kids?" "Don't let your one-year-old twins bring a toy in their stroller out in service..." "You shouldn't wear sundresses because they show too much skin." "You shouldn't wear skirts with slits in them...." "You shouldn't wear slide shoes" "You shouldn't give the young brothers hugs" (Even though *they* hugged me not the other way around.) "You're distracting the brothers..." And on and on and on.... Guess it's up to the woman to control the impulses of the men in this org.

    Well, the shit hit the fan when I got my divorce and suddenly I was "scripturally free to remarry." Well right away I started dating a brother who was a bit younger than me. (He was the one who pushed the stroller LOL) Much to the chagrin of his pioneer, elderette mother.

    The elders had been "working" on this brother for years and he was finally "doing something in the truth." They were about to appoint him as an MS.

    Well, first I was counselled. Then HE was counselled. All of a sudden, where did the LOVE go?

    All of a sudden I was just this "bimbo" going to meetins to "find a mate." I was also a "jezebel influence." And we were "bringing reproach on Jehovah's name."

    Why? I don't know. Maybe because they themselves were miserably married. Maybe because other sisters had tried for several years to "snag" him. Maybe just because the elders had someone else in mind for him. Like they told him, "Out of all the pioneer sisters in the area why are you going for her?" "Why don't you go for someone who was brought up in the truth?" I guess I was just a piece of crap or something. Wish they would have told me that when I was just a study.

    Well, I'm happy to report that we are now in our sixth year of marriage and we're going stronger than ever. My girls view him as a true father. And all of those people basically got the bird from us.

    Isn't it great to be free?

  • LDH


    You go girl!

    When I got engaged/married, the gossip in my old cong. centered around me being a 'gold-digger' because I didn't marry some poor ass JW slacker.

    I went right to the top and got an Executive, girl. I ain't playing.

    I'm kidding--I knew it was all jealousy issues.

    Here we are working on a financial plan for the future and all of my friends were trying to buy new tires for their pioneer-mobiles, LOL.

    It really is the best revenge when you have a great marriage *AND* you've left "the truth."


  • plmkrzy

    It never stopped amazing me the many many scriptures that were read during almost every meeting there was always at least one that pertainedto gossip and how discusting in the eyes of Jehovah it is and to be avoided at all times. UNTIL after the last Prayer was said. Amazing how soon so many would forget. 3 min.[8>]

    No matter how thin you slice it there are always two sides
  • bluesapphire

    WOW Lisa you got an executive!!!

    Mine is poor as hell having never gotten an education. But hey, we're happy.

    Together we make ends meet. We bought a house, we own a new car. We have a nice life together.

    But if only .... he had some $$$ then he'd be perfect.

    And you know what, he could have had some $$$ and been a jerk like the first one. And boy do we have CHEMISTRY!

    Even felt it way back then when he was pushing my stroller.

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