From JW to Pagan

by Sirona 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • Silverleaf
    Silverleaf

    Hi again, Sirona,

    You wrote:Thats an interesting story about your boyfriend...Im sure he was upset with you!!

    I think he was less upset with me than he was upset for himself. He did a lot of suffering over the idea that I was going to die and he would have to live forever in paradise without me - and yet he told me that Jehovah would take away everyone's pain. He didn't get it when I said, "Why be so upset then? In paradise you won't even remember that I existed, you won't be missing me for eternity." He seemed to want to suffer now for something he believed he would have no memory of in the new system and that made zero sense to me.

    He wanted so hard to convince me that there was nothing more horrible than ceasing to exist, as the unbelievers would. It made him very frustrated when I said things like, "Will I know I won't exist?" "No."
    "Then what's so bad about it? I won't know I don't exist, I won't know I ever existed and neither will anyone else. Who suffers?" He kept telling me I just didn't understand. Finally I just said, "You know, you're right. I don't understand and I never will." I guess to his mindset it was like a person with a treatable cancer refusing any medical intervention. He couldn't understand why I wanted to die, and I couldn't understand why he didn't want to live.

    Silverleaf

  • Xander
    Xander

    Wiccans!

    Howdy. Me, I'm pagan myself, but have not got into witchcraft at all (Wiccan or otherwise). I've known a few witches, but none recently, unfortunately...I did have a few questions.

    I'm surprised this thread hasn't had more posters - I've noticed a lot of people mention pagan leanings in their profile.

    (naeb: last night, Mango *did* suggest to expatbrit to change his profile pic to something more sexy than a tiger....)

    Xander F
    (Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)

    A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
    --George Santayana

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    Silverleaf,

    Exactly! They are so focused on getting into their new world that they don't stop to think if they really WANT to be there or not. I know that if God were going to destroy all non-jws, than I'd rather die than be in his new world where people will immediately be punished by death if they so happen to put a foot 'wrong' by worshipping God differently. Thats just not freedom.

    Then theres the conflict, like you said. They don't want to be without you, but they want the new world. Its so hard to imagine being happy if all your family and friends are killed by Jehovah.

    He couldn't understand why I wanted to die, and I couldn't understand why he didn't want to live.
    That is all too familiar to me. I've been on both sides of the fence, and I think that they do think they're living, despite the lack of freedom they have.

    Sirona

    ** http://www.religioustolerance.org **

  • happy man
    happy man

    Intresting topic.
    Myself is a JW sens my birth,, two of my sons are not JW, i dont understand so much what you mean widh pagan, but my sons are very intrested inn a book, the truth shall sett you free, by David Icke, someone now what this is?
    someone talk abauot whichcraft, isnt this bokk something like this?

  • 4christ
    4christ

    Funk and Wagnalls dictionary:

    pagan 1. One who is neither a Christian, a Jew, nor a Moslem; a heathen. 2. In early Christian use, an idol worshipper. 3. An irreligious person.

  • arachnia
    arachnia

    This thread caught my attention, I figured I should check in on it. ;)

    Probably the most accurate, concise summary of my own beliefs is "Agnostic with Pagan Sentiments." Basically, while I would like to believe in the myths, gods, etc that I love, I personally haven't seen the empirical evidence for them to support those beliefs. That does not mean, however, that I don't fully respect others who feel that they have seen the evidence they need. If I didn't respect that and didn't have a love for the subject matter, I wouldn't have my site.

    Now, the question has arisen, what does the word "pagan" actually mean. Having done quite a bit of study on this subject myself, I'd like to share what I've found.

    Firstly, I am going to use "Pagan" when referencing it as a religious structure, just as I extend the same courtesy to capital-c Christians, capital-B Buddhists, and so on. It's nice to extend the same courtesy to others that one expects or would like to receive themselves, no? :)

    Now, onto the etymology. Modern dictionaries generally define it as shown in 4christs's post, as a term that is only anti- or opposite in nature. However, the most up to date editions of some dictionaries (such as the highly reputable American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language: 4th Edition) add to these definitions the recognition of the modern usage within the "Neo-Pagan" context. (see: http://www.bartleby.com/61/11/P0011100.html)

    Digging deeper, looking at the Latin root: paganus, is said to mean "country dweller, civilian." While most etymologies leave it at that, suggesting that "Pagans" were considered in those times to be the uneducated country hicks who maintained folk beliefs, etc., another origin for the term has been suggested. We find that paganus is derived from pagus, meaning "district." With that established, consider that when the term Pagan was first applied to people, Pagans and those living in urban areas were part of the intelligensia. So the "country dweller" interpretation doesn't make a great deal of sense.

    Now, getting back to the "district." Historically, Pagan beliefs have been tied to particular geographic areas and cultures, each having their own unique pantheons and holy sites. This stood in stark contrast to Christianity, which was considered the "universal" religion. This makes better sense to me, that Pagan would have its roots in the concept of beliefs centered on places and things that had special meaning (i.e., holy/sacred) to the local inhabitants.

    A special thanks to one of my mentors, Ceisiwr Serith, for bringing this information to my attention. He is an Indo-European scholar and a gentleman, and therefore I would like to credit him for this knowledge. It is a special honor to know him. And no, he has no idea that I am posting these niceties, they are completely sincere on my part. :)

    Well, I hope that I haven't bored anyone too much, and that maybe someone will even find this tidbit valuable. :)

    Cheers,
    ~arachnia

    Say not, "I have found the truth," but rather, "I have found a truth."
    -Kahlil Gibran

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    Thankyou Arachnia,
    Thats great information.

    Xander, I am surprised there haven't been more posts too. I really wanted to ask pagans how they managed to "get over" their JW beliefs. Its been a long path for me to become pagan because at first I was scared to death of anything - thinking there were demons everywhere!

    Sirona

    ** http://www.religioustolerance.org **

  • Xander
    Xander

    I think the reason you justfiy leaving the org has a lot to do with it. For me, it was research into the bible. Once I found out it was nothing but a collection of fables (almost all based on earlier pagan teachings), it became easier to just 'throw the whole thing out', and start over.

    Since I was raised in the org, and had no other religious background to fall back on, it was a clean slate for me to find what fit best.

    Xander F
    (Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)

    A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
    --George Santayana

  • SpiderMonkey
    SpiderMonkey

    Whoa! I just joined this forum, & happened to run across a post from a Wiccan ex-Jdub, & did a search on "pagan", & came across this...

    Pardon my French, but Mwahaha.

    It's interesting to me that a number of folks mentioned ex-Jdubs becoming Pagans in large numbers, because that would seem, at a glance, to indicate we did so as a reaction, or a "stab," back at our roots or last affiliation... In my own case, though, I know that's not true, because I spent a year or so (after leaving) thinking that JW's were right, but I didn't care because it went so far against my grain to believe & live as they did (I was ready to die at Armageddon, as long as I enjoyed the time up until then). Time sort of wore that one away, though; I became more agnostic, believing that any god who might exist must not care one way or another... And then I dated a Wiccan/Witch a few years later - she never tried to "convert" me, but answered all my questions about it, and I found myself thinking back to my childhood... I'd always been fascinated by Greek myths & gods, even well into my JW indoctrination - even in my high school years, as a baptized JW, I was fantasizing about the possibility of having my own gods & goddesses, each having their separate roles over various realms of life, Like the Greek deities, but with faces or aspects that made the most sense to me personally. So as I heard my girlfriend say things like "the earth is our Mother, the sky is our Father," and so on, it rang a bell inside me and I started reading. Even though that relationship only lasted 3 months, and I never told her I was interested in Paganism, well... By the end of 3 months, I knew that I was a Pagan through and through! I doubt I'll ever belong to any organized religion, Pagan or otherwise, but finding my *own* true path to the divine for the past 5 years has been the most enlightening, liberating experience of my life! I'd be very interested to hear from other XJW Pagans about their personal experiences.

    peas, SpiderMonkey

  • GentlyFeral
    GentlyFeral

    Sirona:

    Say I split up with my lawyer boyfriend who has dark hair and dark eyes and a love of all things calm - I'd be infinately more likely to then go for a blonde, blue eyed traveller who likes adventure sports.

    For me, paganism has been more like nutritional therapy. Spending far too much time as a jaydub starved me of all the good things paganism supplies: beauty, art, a huge field for the imagination, freedom, pleasure, and respect for other people and their beliefs.

    Superficially our analagies sound alike, but it wasn't so much a way as getting back at my former religion as filling needs that had gone unmet for over twenty years.

    Gently Feral

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