Good Signs from my wife? maybe? She wants to improve her thinking ability!

by thecrushed 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • whathappened
    whathappened

    Anything that will pull her attention and perhaps her heart away from the organization would be a blessing to you in the long run.

  • dreamgolfer
    dreamgolfer

    Self Esteem is a product of our upbringing. If she has issues with that - a social worker can help her with that. unfortunately the WTBTS keeps you in that "low self worth" position by saying we are NEVER worthy to think for ourselves. Education - good step forward, but hold back on the deep thoughts about what YOU KNOW, the time is not right Sounds like she is moving in the right direction...let her keep rolling herself forward, DONT PUSH HER

  • Pickler
    Pickler

    You can simply walk to Mordor.....but first you have to fly to New Zealand.

    I'd attach the link but it's 12.30am & I'm tired....

  • gone for good
    gone for good

    Crush-

    Could you bring home a 'classic' such as Animal Farm or 1984 and between

    your reading sessions, leave it on the coffee table or sofa?

  • Emma
    Emma

    Maybe try to find an activity or class she wants to attend that happens to be on a meeting night. You can promise to take her to a make-up meeting at another congregation. It's not so easy to make up that missed meeting. It happened with me. My kids wanted a Thursday night activity really bad so i thought I'd temporarily go to the cong that had that meeting on Wed. Never happened, gave me another way down that path! Unknowingly, it could begin her fade.

  • likeabird
    likeabird
    Lost GEnwierd thing is she has a college degree already but it has been a long time for her. We are both really busy so mostly I'm thinking internet free courses and stuff. I'm the one with no degree LOL but with the critical thinking skills and Independant mind.
    She is a smart person even though she doesn't think so. She has a huge self esteem issue.

    While you can mention in passing the WT infallacies, I would focus on building up her self-esteem.

    My first suggestion (but that has already been taken) was to offer for her to go back to school and knock off some of her dreams.

    For an intelligent person stuck in the borg, that can feel amazing, and may also be liberating.

    So is there something she loves that she has held off or put off until paradise because of the borg? Are there things she'd like to study more? Would she like to start her own business? Are there small things she's always wanted to try? Places she wanted to see?

    You can basically open up the world to her and you will see her gain confidence. Let her rediscover her own abilities and see different doors open to her.

    (You will basically be building up a new life for you both before you fully tear down the old. I believe that is a WT strategy!)

  • Captain Obvious
    Captain Obvious

    Hell yeah it's a good sign! A Dub rarely hears about what critical thinking is, and would rarely think it is useful to them. Just lay off of doctrinal issues and science altogether for a while.

    If she says she feels her mind is turning to mush, that's because it is. I remember exactly the feeling you described earlier. Describing logical fallacies is good, a list is better. There are a few good YouTube videos that actually show them being used. I found that to be the best personally.

    It might just be wishful thinking, but if she once again feels intellectually empowered she might even allow herself to see the bullshit in the pages of the WT. if you jump on it too hard, she might see your motives and back off the whole thing. This could be a great opportunity!

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    When she reaches a conclusion, even if you disagree with it, honor her right to choose. I think that would go a long way to build her self-esteem. That doesn't mean you can't question it with some gentle socratic questioning.

  • Roberta804
    Roberta804

    Go slow.... Go very slow, have patience. Keep her talking, ask open ended questions if any at all. You have set her feet on a path, but she has to tread it. Just be there for her. When she is ready, you will know.

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