the other side of disfellowshipping

by nowwhat? 19 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • nowwhat?
    nowwhat?

    personally i hate it when you come face to face with someone disfellowshiped and you can't do a simple acknowledgement or greeting. they are obviously making an effort to be there to be reinstated. as i recall back in the 1970's they did allow this but what is always the case some took advantage of this provision and in engaged in full blown conversations. so it was changed to the present form of shunning. how do you differentiate between someone [especially a young one] who made a mistake[s] and someone who is deceitful and rotten to the core? that you want to protect the congregation from?

  • LouBelle
    LouBelle

    just shows you how unloving that is. If someone is repentant they should be accepted right then and there. The bible says once you ask Jah for forgiveness your sin is far away as the east is from the west....or something along those lines.

  • Tater-T
    Tater-T

    yes the total we can't even stand the sight of you is really bad...

    I have a question along these lines.. was thinking of starting a thread on this, but it's fitting here.

    When I was DF'd in 1987, they told me I could sit anywhere in the hall..that the spirit protected everyone from me during the meeting.. LOL so I sat up close with everyone.. at which, durning the meeting some would exchange a glance and a smile with me, then a look of horror and panic at the thought of me ...

    Then the elders told me that I need to sit at the back of the hall because I made the congregation feel uncomfortable.. I remember most Df's people did sit at the back of the usually out of shame .. I didn't want to be like that..this was the final straw and why I walked away..

    My Question is .. Is it now policy for DF'd people to sit at the back of the hall? does anyone know either way? I thought I saw on a post that it was, or do most just do that out of shame..

    thanks

  • jws
    jws

    My thoughts would be for any invidual, guage their threat to you and use your own judgement.

    Let's say you're a happily married person. There's some young brother or sister that gives into temptation, has sex, and gets DF'ed. Technically if they're sorry, they shouldn't even be DF'ed. But it happens anyway. Is this person a threat to you? Because they gave into temptation, is that going to give into some sort of sexual temptation and wreck your marriage? Probably not.

    On the other hand, you have some real a-hole. He may be out to swindle people, a user, just plain mean, etc. You don't really like the person whether they're DF'ed or not. Then stay away from them.

    Remember, when you're out in the everyday world, you're encountering people at work, at school, etc. Some may get drunk, some people may smoke pot every now and then. Others have sex without being married. Some, heaven forbid, even commit the terrible sin of celebrating their birthdays. Yet you say hi to them. Some of them you talk to. Some of them you may even be friends with. And yet this doesn't infect you.

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    I'm not aware of that being "policy".

    I think most do it to avoid being even more uncomfortable.

    Doc

  • Tater-T
    Tater-T
    I'm not aware of that being "policy".
    I think most do it to avoid being even more uncomfortable

    yes I'm sure thats probaly the case.. I'm pretty brash and bold, bosterious is a word often used to desribe me, lol.. I sat in the 3rd row back right in the middle so everyone could see me..

    hey I wanted to let them know I was there lol.. they felt more uncomfortable than I did...

  • Poztate
    Poztate
    My Question is .. Is it now policy for DF'd people to sit at the back of the hall?

    I don't think it's oficial policy either but many elders are control freaks.

    At school years ago the teacher used to put misbehaving kids on a chair facing the corner of the room.

    Maybe the GB should look into doing this....

  • GoneAwol
    GoneAwol

    Of the 4 congs we`ve been in, it has always been policy for disso`d peeps to sit at the back. Apparently its to help them cope with the shame and slip in and out of the hall without people staring at them. I personally think its bollocks. Every single person i knew that was d/shipped i had conversations with.

    When me and Free and Happy got married in 91, there was a spate of our peers getting d/shipped. I made a point of talking to them when i could. People make mistakes, but they shouldnt have to keep paying for them with constant shaming. Thats cruel, you wouldnt even do it to a dog.

  • Tater-T
    Tater-T

    thanks for the responses it's been a question I've had.. and wanted to share what happened to me..

    So in line with the OP.. not only is it, not a greeting.. but shame, exclude, humilate don't even dare make eye contact until they truly know how much the congegation LOVES them.

  • moshe
    moshe
    personally i hate it when you come face to face with someone\

    It's time for you to be accountable for your own actions as regards your shunning of people who have left the KH.

    The general public only get lies from JWs when they ask about their shunning policies towards former JWs. -They lie, because they know it's a despicable WT policy and it would bring public shame to themselves to admit the true scope of all the familes they have broken up.

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