Blood transfusions and JW children in a household with a non-believer parent

by never a jw 22 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  never a jw

  I am not a JW. Just recently my daughter ask for permission to get baptized. Not knowing the mess that my wife's religion is, I consented. After a lot of research, I now regret my decision. My daughter is 17, and my unbaptized son is 13. Since the belief of the blood transfusions can actually cost the life of one of them, I am actually considering to meet with the elders of the congregation and expose the weakness of the doctrine from every angle possible while having my children present. My approach would be:

  1.- that the biblical text is ambiguous at best, and the current JW interpretation therefore likely erroneous,

  2.- that accepting blood fractions is completely inconsistent with their belief of not accepting blood transfusions,

  3.- that accepting fractions is inconsistent, even hypocritical, because the fractions needed to save the life of a JW will have to come from a blood donation from a non-JW

  4.- and that if the leadership has been wrong so many times and has continually flipped-flopped about many doctrines and prophecies in the past, why should we trust our children to them in a matter of life and death such as blood transfusions.

  My goal is to bring enough doubt to my children, especially my daughter, so they can reconsider their position about blood transfusions, and ultimately about their religion.

  I know many of you are very knowledgeable and wise. You know far better than I do the mindset of an elder and of JW children. What would you advise? Should I do it or not do it? And if I do it, how should I go about it?

  Thanks for all the advice.
• 

  Tater-T

  you should see about anulling the baptism too.. it's a contract with a publishing company and 17 is not old enough...I think
• 

  ABibleStudent

  Hi never a jw

  Have you read any of Steve Hassan's books (i.e., "Combatting Cult Mind Control", "Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves", and (his latest) "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs") or visited his website ? At least visit Steve Hassan's website to either contact Steve Hassan directly or see a psychologist that he refers you to before you see the elders. If you see the elders and disagree with WTBTS's doctrines you will be putting a metaphorical target on your back. Please remember the WTBTS is a DANGEROUS CULT and not a religion, so logic and Biblical scriptures will not sway the elders and possibly not your daugther or wife, until they awaken.

  I would recommend using a stealth approach with your JW family members. Do not condemn the WTBTS and encourage your daughter to see non-JWs, who you like. If your family goes to WTBTS conventions, search for hotels that are not promoted by the WTBTS and with nicer accommdations for the same or lower price. I would recommend using www.travelzoo.com or www.priceline.com to make reservations. Consider it a mini-vacation from the WTBTS and JWs.

  Start making new friends with people, who are not JWs, your wife might have similiar interests with, and may have children the same age as yours. Always encourage your children to make play dates with children who you like and like their parents. If your wife questions you about this, say that you want some alone time with her to have fun and not pay for sitters. Getting to know good people who you and your wife like will help you form a support network, if she is DF'ed or DA'ed and will help awaken your wife.

  Best of Wishes for you and your family.

  Peace be with you and everyone, who you know,

  Robert
• 

  Balaamsass

  Did you just give her permission, or has she actually already gotten baptised?

  Why not reason with her that it is wise to examine ones beliefs and she should read JW.facts, JW. Survey, and Barbra Anderson's "Watchtower documents" ? Tell her the BIBLE speaks highly about the Boreans "who carefully EXAMINED what they learned". Make reading and Studying those sites a pre-condition of her getting baptised.

  Tell her you are the HEAD of the House according to the bible and Jehovah's Witnesses and she and her mother are supposed to be submisive and respectful or your concerns as her father. This is because you LOVE her.

  DO NOT go head to head or become confrontational. Be kind, reasonable but firm. You don't want to be labeled "an opposer".

  Teach her to use her brains..she will soon be 18 and JWs are not the only sandtrap she will face in life. (sweet talking boys are out there too!)

  my 2 cents
• 

  garyneal

  Since the belief of the blood transfusions can actually cost the life of one of them, I am actually considering to meet with the elders of the congregation and expose the weakness of the doctrine from every angle possible while having my children present.

  I don't know how far you are thinking of getting with them. A general rule of thumb with witnesses is to never ever discuss doctrine. They will defend it even if they know that it makes no sense. I've done this with a pioneer brother sometime back and chronicled our discussion here. If you wish to skip ahead to our 'discussion' about the blood doctrine, skip to my post number 2762 here. I've had these same discussions with my wife and even she will defend it even though I can tell I got her thinking. They will never EVER claim that the SLAVE is wrong about things. If you have not noticed yet, even when the watchtower changes a doctrine and teaches the exact opposite, they were never wrong. It is all filed under new light.

  Your better bet is to try to get the kids to reason on it themselves. Ask questions but don't appear that you are trying to discredit the religion. If your daughter is already baptized then she obviously sees some significance to this religion. If she loves you then she cannot possibly believe everything they say. After all, they teach that all non witnesses will die at armageddon. If she hears this then she either does not believe it about you or she is VERY VERY concerned for you and scared witless.

  Here is a video that may help you.

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=949n_xH9nso&list=PL7EE047005059527B
• 

  exwhyzee

  My non JW father died because he signed the "no blood"paperwork before he had heart surgery. All he knew about blood transfusions is what he learned when he studied with the Witnesses decades ago. He only signed those papers because he was a bit squeamish about blood and his doctor assured him there was no way blood would even be an issue. Two years later they came out with the new light about blood fractions which may have saved him had it come sooner. I'm certain he'd have seen the contradiction in allowing fractions that were taken from a blood doner's arm yet prohibiting the use of whole blood. He'd have realized that these men should not be in the habit if dispensing medical advice.

  Be sure you have a counter argument for Deut 12:16 where it talks about not eating blood. They view transfusing blood as being the same as eating it. They compare it to alcohol. If a doctor tells you to abstain from alcohol but you put it in your veins, it's the same as if you drank it. To me that example doesn't compare apples to apples since the motive behind the prohibitive against blood isn't a medical one but because god said not to eat it because he views blood as sacred. Putting alcohol in your veins will have the same effect on the body as drinking it does. Eating blood and transfusing it would have two very different results. This scripture was talking about animal blood and besides,transfusing blood hadn't even been thought of. If blood is sacred and life is in the blood,why not use it to save a life rather than pour it out on the ground? Also there are any number of medicines that would harm you if you ingested them but would cure you if you took them intraveinously(chemo,certain dosages of antibiotics etc) to use the alcohol analogy seems logical at first but to me isn't enough.

  P.S. I don't know why you have to even talk to these guys. I think I'd find out what your leagal rights as a father would be if a blood emergency arose.
• 

  Splash

  Ask how it is that babies can literally eat white blood cells from their mothers milk, but could not receive them in a transfusion?

  Splash
• 

  wasblind

  Jehovah's witnesses say that blood fractions are no longer considered to be blood

  because they have been broken down into somethin' else

  I wonder if Eve could have been pardoned if she made a fruit pie

  out of the fraction she bit off
• 

  never a jw

  Tater,

  I thought about that, but I never heard or read of a succesful case before, so I dropped the idea.

  aBible Student,

  Thanks, I certainly will read Hassan's book, and also thank you for all the other advice

  Balaam

  She baptized already few months ago. I have asserted my head of houseold position, but I need to be persuasive . I hesitate to take them out of the JW World even with persuasion. Their social life with other JW's ia their main social life.

  Exwhyzee,

  Thanks for the analogies. My legal rights, I am pretty sure, are the same as those of my wife. The legal route is my last resort, but certainly not out of the question.

  Splash and Was Blind,

  Thanks for the ideas.
• 

  never a jw

  Garyneal,

  Thanks for the video. Regarding my purposes, I want to make a dent in the conviction of other JW's, but mainly in the conviction of my own children regarding their ill conceived ideas. Ultimately, I want to be able to expand my possibilities of saving their lives if the need for blood transfusions arises. Also, I want to avoid wasting valuable time in a debate with my wife and daughter in the emergency room.