Partakers of emblems in 2010, 2011 and 2012?

by Christiana 40 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • steve2
    steve2

    Will it be a happifying or a sadifying number?

  • Captain Obvious
    Captain Obvious

    I have head JWs excuse it because they've been doing the memorial invitation work since about then, and they have to count even random people who come from the community and partake.

  • Splash
    Splash

    Steve2, It will be happifying.

    Up or down, there will be a good and scripture based reason why this proves armageddon is nearer than ever.

    Splash.

  • slimboyfat
    slimboyfat

    I find it quite surprising that they don't just lie about the number actually, because who would ever know?

    When all the reports come in, and the number is higher than last year, why not just keep that fact to themselves, and publish a lower number? If they were really the cynical bastards that they are sometimes taken for, surely they would have thought of that!

    They could even conjure up a quasi-spiritual justification, such as reasoning that "apostates" must be infiltrating the congregation and partaking. Therefore suppressing the number would be thwarting Satan's machinations, or some such.

  • yadda yadda 2
    yadda yadda 2

    They aren't going to lie about the numbers, sheesh. Some of you apostates are ridiculous. It will absolutely just keep going up and up until eventually just stop reporting it altogether (along with a whole lot of other statistics, to camouflage it) or bring in some 'new light' to explain it all away.

  • slimboyfat
    slimboyfat

    Why wouldn't they lie about it? What's to stop them?

  • slimboyfat
    slimboyfat

    Do we think they are smart enough to come up with 'new light' that could explain consistently rising numbers?

    Doctrinal innovation is not what it once was in this organization.

  • irondork
    irondork

    Great thread, Christiana! :)

  • hamsterbait
    hamsterbait

    Steve2 -

    use your spellchecker: saDDifying. Edumecation sure is goin' to the dawgs...

    HB

  • steve2
    steve2
    Steve2 -
    use your spellchecker: saDDifying. Edumecation sure is goin' to the dawgs...
    HB

    Actually, HB I did. The New Zealand Dictionary of Bastardized English (Ed. G. Horace Horsefly, PhD) has this entry:

    "Sadifying - adjective; sometimes incorrectly spelt saddifying, but correctly as sadify, after sad; contrast spelling with happifying which derives from happy; this rule does not apply to Americans who have proved incapable of spelling anything correctly.

    The adjective denotes a state of pathetic and entrenched sadness resulting from an emerging awareness that one has spent one's life under the infantile and misguided influence of the Watchtower Society. Those who are sadified are desperately annoying people to socialize with because attempts to help them recover and get a life are often doomed to failure; those who are sadified gain short-term relief from licking their wounds and exclaiming "Woe is me" over and over. Do not - repeat do not - offer to lick their wounds for them. Have more respect for your tongue or you too will be sadified.

    Accepted usage examples: (1) "Maryanne was sadified to learn that the Watchtower magazine she had long viewed as God's inerrant channel of communication was the brain-child of a white-bearded gnat who never had the decency to sign his pompous expositions 'JK' (i.e., 'Just kidding; don't change your life on account of my predictions')"; (2) "After wearing out uncounted pairs of cheap, smelly shoes trudging door to door across a frightening collection of decades, JW Derek was sadified to experience the dawning realization that he could have led a comparatively more productive life sitting on his arse in McDonald's scoffing McNuggets. He now felt a complete McFool and was irredeemably sadified."

    The only known cure for a sadified state is a damn good knock on the skull or, failing that, daily vigorous slaps across each side of the face (if you're lucky like Chuck, having a beard softens the blows). The blows may not make the individual feel better, but those inflicting the blows report feeling better and could be described as finding the scheduled violence against the miserable victims makes some of them happified because it is perceived as religious persecution. But they are simply misguided fools: God also cannot stand them and is expectantly rubbing his powerful and authoritative hands together in anticipation of inflicting a few slaps of his own as per The Divine Plan of the Ages. " (page 593)

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit