yes, Jehovahs Witnesses actually WANT to be offended: it serves a persecution complex that has been
programmed into them consistently
That's an understandable but very sweeping generalization. Many of the JWs I rubbed shoulders with in my youth were not of the 'persecute me' mentality - but in fact felt acutely embarrassed around non-JW peers such as colleagues and work associates. In general, the younger a born-in JW is, the less zealous they tend to be.
Personality also comes into the equation. For example, even though I was a born-in, I enjoyed making it known at school that I was a witness but my older sister went through lots of turmoil about others knowing - she was shy and often had self-esteem problems. She didn't even want me to stick up for her because it made her feel even worse. I've known of so many other younger JWs who truly suffered in silence when others made a critical fuss over them for being JWs.
Sure, some of the old-timers savored standing out as different - they'd even defiantly do so. That breed of JWs is increasingly rare - especially in some of the more 'laid back' countries like New Zealand where you do not do things that stamp you as different.
BTW, I do not think that any of this is a problem needing to be solved. A lot of the stuff we go through as children can toughen us up and even lead to a feeling of accomplishment if we are helped through it. My JW parents were aware that their children had a variable experience of being JWs and were able to help my sister. Over time, she learnt how to be more outgoing and had a clearer sense of herself. I'm pleased to say that, even though she is accepting of me no longer being a JW - yes we are in lots of positive contact - she still identifies herself very discreetly as a JW. We each respect the others views and "don't go there".