Quit being apostates and give me some real advice

by AwSnap 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • panhandlegirl
    panhandlegirl

    I would keep sending appropriate gifts and cards to your niece. If she gets them, that's good, if not, you tried. I sent graduation announcemenst when I got my BSN to my older JW sisterrs. They never acknowledged

    it but my non-jw cousin told me they mentioned it to her. They also told her that they had had to give me up because I left the organization. It's hard not to desire a connection with your family.

  • outsmartthesystem
    outsmartthesystem

    I agree. Don't give up. But Shawn is right. You are not the parent thus you have no control over whether or not the child will ever entertain a relationship with you. Be prepared for the child to be indoctrinated as she grows older. Be prepared for her to turn a cold shoulder to you when she is old enough to do it for herself (instead of her parents doing it for her).

    It is sad and heart breaking.....but the likely future shunning you will receive from her is not her fault

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    If your niece is only 3, she might not appreciate the little item.

    Maybe wait until she's six or seven?

    Or maybe give it to HER mother - your sister - with a comment to the effect that SHE'S missing out on getting to know HER little niece.....

    Zid - oh, and GLAD to have you back on the board, if only for a little bit!!! (Life with a little one is HECTIC!!!)

  • Band on the Run
    Band on the Run

    My concern would be her age. Small children need a consistent parent. I saw a child completely torn apart by competing parents. She will still be around when she is a bit older.

    She can't get it unless your sister gives it to her. I would want some treats from an aunt.

    I met my nephew for the first time when he was 11. It has been very awkward. He was not a nice kid. As soon as he left for college, his personaltiy transformed. He is so different and nice now! Family situations should never get so drastic that there is no bridge back. Also, I would view it as a rejection of me. A child can't understand complicated adult relationships and religions.

  • AwSnap
    AwSnap

    Band on the run...not sure I follow what you're saying. My niece's parents *are* consistently VERY STRICT JW'S.

    I will not go behind my sister's back to make contact with my sweet niece. Anything that is intended for my niece will be sent to my sister 1st.

    Regarding the 2nd-half of your comment, *I* was a HORRIBLE kid. I mean....HORRIBLE. I talked back...didn't care who the hell you were. I had some major issues with authority of any kind. Looking back, I'm so embarrassed with the way I was. People today think I am one of the most laid back, caring people they've ever met. (and I *am*...its not a cover, lol).

    Thank you, everyone. I know that I have no control whether she actually gets any gifts from me. As a sidenote, the keychain was a complete dud....the battery wouldn't stay charged.

    My point is that I never want her to think that I voluntarily stepped out of her life.

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