STEP RIGHT UP Hurry Hurry Hurry We've got the cure for what ails you!

by Terry 46 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • Terry
    Terry

    Step right up close Ladies and Gents.

    LISTEN UP!!

    Are ya fat? Ugly? Stupid? Do you slur your words or sound like a country bumpkin? Do ya have fallen arches and bad breath? Is your skin itchy and do you pass gas like jalopy with a bad valve? Don't despair! All you need is a COMPLETE OVERHAUL! Let us show you how to become so perfect you can laugh out loud as you watch the others who made fun of you die screaming in bewildered agony! Here's how. 1.First we convince you we know what we are talking about and NOBODY else does. a.We demonstrate the mistakes the other guys make. b.We show you how to ridicule authority and look smart. 2.Next, we show you what an extreme loser you are now and how we can fix that. a.We give you lessons in how to see yourself as part of a huge group of losers doomed to destruction. b.We invite you to surrender your worthless brain and join our group of winners. 3.As a special introductory offer we are prepared to love you so much (for a trial period ONLY) that you'll actually enjoy our endless spate of boring get-togethers at the local Kingdom Hall. You'll be the center of attention as we persuade, cajole, frighten and soothe you with our rhetoric. 4.Act now! This limited offer expires so soon you can't believe how close to the end we are! If you don't act now you'll be face down in the street with blood running like a garden hose. HURRY! HURRY! HURRY! YOU WORTHLESS LOSER. WE'RE THE ONLY ONES WHO CAN HELP YOU SAVE YOUR MISERABLE ASS! Brought to you by the makers of WATCHTOWER magazine cult. (No competitor coupons accepted.)

  • lifestooshort
    lifestooshort

    Terry, that's a good one. LOL

  • thetrueone
    thetrueone

    Superlative Terry

    Would you ever think about starting your own religious cult ?

    I'm going to keep this on hand I think its that good......good job

  • lifestooshort
    lifestooshort

    It sounds like you do not approve Terry's post. And I am surprised you posted your disapproval.

  • N.drew
    N.drew

    Sorry, seems you posted and so did I at the same time Janet.

    What does this mean? " I think a lot of JWs are really, really suffering right about now"

    Janet B, Terry wrote a parody. In your opinion how is it able to destroy anything?

    It's satire, a form of writing style. The truth, I have found, is to follow no man.

    How does what Terry wrote stop a person's search?

  • Terry
    Terry

    Hi Terry

    I was wondering if we could have a "friendly" discussion about what you have posted above?

    Hi Janet B!

    I'm friendly. I discuss things (we are even meeting here on a Discussion group!)

    What I see here, your depiction of things or slant on things [or the confused JW's predictament], really kind of makes me feel like a complete fool for ever joining. LOL.

    Well, as long as you are laughing out loud, I guess: no harm done!

    Your sense of feeling bad may be understandable.

    The Watchtower Society makes themselves out to be the ONLY HOPE.

    It isn't.

    It is not only deeply flawed; it has always been wrong.

    There is considerable joy, hope, and purpose in this world and a lot of terrific people. The Watchtower lied to you when they told you it wasn't.

    I'm just here make you THINK. Something JW's aren't allowed to do without feeling terrible!

  • N.drew
    N.drew

    It's true, but exaggerated.

    I did not look to any human for their approval when I left the Watchtower. I went in blind and came out blind. It was only after I made my decision that I looked You all up. I suppose that makes me different.

    I do not believe I was a fool to join and get baptised. My baptism was to God, not to man, I think they teach that.

    I learned a lot of good things in my 20 years with them. I wasn't fooled by them. I was misled by them, not fooled. Were you?

  • NomadSoul
    NomadSoul

    I'll take one bottle please!

  • N.drew
    N.drew

    Janet, I was searching for Jesus when I joined. I thought my baptizm would make me properly conditioned to meet the king. (remember Ester?). I thought the organization was like me, searching for the truth. But I came to find out they do not search, but they rely on men. The Bible says do not do that. So if people do lean on men's understanding, they should feel foolish. Because Jehovah's Witnesses say they take their doctrine right from the Bible but the Bible says don't do that but they do it.

  • N.drew
    N.drew

    We seem to be posting at the same time. Did Jeremiah not go with the remnant to Egypt? He was not fooled, he was misled. There is a difference.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit