I know of a husband (not baptised) of a sister, who said once that he was not good enough to be a jw, who killed himself earlier this year. He left behind two teenage kids as well. No funeral, a quick cremation. It was like the poor guy never existed.
As for myself, at one time there i was, a ministerial servant, recent parent, past reg pio, rising star of the congo, standing on the cliff top near home, seriously wanting to jump...I was so darn depressed. I could not help my wife understand or deal with it, shit, i had no idea myself. In a nutshell, i will boil it down to massive lack of self worth. The WT taught me that all my thoughts, feelings and desires of that time were satans. I battled long inside until i had to run. I didnt realize at the time it was to save my life. The reasons and effects, the feelings of those times still overwhelm me at times and it takes others to shake me out of blue funk. (You know who you are!)
Yeah, the happyest people on earth...what a joke!
oz