Taking Back the Holidays

by Quendi 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • ocd
    ocd

    @ Quendi-I feel much the same about christmas,thanksgiving and birthdays. I'm still in but plan on celebrating with my family(non witless) anyway. I have suffered from depression for many years at this time of year. This year WILL be different no matter the cost. I appreciate all of your posts. You have brought a smile in the sadest moments.

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    Well...

    Here's what I did, last Halloween...

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/social/entertainment/201471/1/Halloween-at-Ziddys-House

    But I'm not going to do as much, this year, 'cuz Halloween is on a MOnday, this year...

    I'm getting thoroughly sick of Christmas, and I can't quite figure out why....

    Of course, I have to do EVERYthing - hubby won't even write cards to his OWN FAMILY...

    Yeah, that's why I've become sick of Xmas...

  • Quendi
    Quendi

    I wish you a happy holiday season, ocd, and I'm sure your non-Witness family will be very happy to see you have a full share in their celebrations. My own relatives live in the Deep South whereas I live in Colorado. Nevertheless, I have a large extended family of non-Witnesses here and they have always extended invitations to have holiday dinner with them. I am especially looking forward to this year's merrymaking.

    I'm sorry, ziddina, that your husband isn't more helpful to help you prepare for the holidays. It is a lot of work to send cards, invitations, put up decorations, etc. Let me suggest that you consult with others about how you can get him involved. You may have done so in the past and the advice you were given didn't work, but don't give up!

    Quendi

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    Uhm, thank you very much for the well-wishes, Quendi... I hope that you have a wonderful holiday season!!

    Unfortunately, my hubby is a lazy bustard who's gotten used to not having to do anything about the holidays...

    If I left it up to him, nothing would be done.

    I'm beginning to think that a divorce is the only real cure...

    Zid

  • Quendi
    Quendi

    I thought I'd let everyone know how my first celebration of a "worldly" holiday went. I participated in the observance of the American Thanksgiving holiday which is celebrated on the fourth Thursday in November. Traditionally, this means preparing a feast in which roast turkey is the main entree.

    Yours Truly volunteered to do most of the cooking and I had a blast. Planning the menu, shopping for the needed items, doing almost all of the cooking, and interacting with friends and guests was a big thrill. My housemates set a magnificent table complete with their best china, crystal and real silverware. The table also had a beautiful cloth laid over it and there were candles as well. We had water and wine to drink and I got high praise for the food.

    The last time I had sat down to a table like this was when my paternal grandmother was alive more than forty years ago. The last time I ate a real Thanksgiving dinner was more than thirty years ago, before I moved to Colorado. Prior to moving here, I always ate Thanksgiving dinner with my fleshly family, something that my parents especially appreciated. In the years since, I had forgotten just how wonderful preparing and participating in such things were.

    Having a full share in Thanksgiving has shown me what holidays and celebrations really mean. They are a way of connecting on an even deeper level with the people we love and care about. They are a way of giving of oneself. They are a way of soaking up as much love and appreciation as one can. And I have also seen how the Witnesses' ban on holiday observances is unchristian, unloving, unkind and even immoral. The organization's leaders have a joyless, ascetic view of life that only makes people unhappy and feeling unloved and unappreciated. I'm grateful to have left that behind.

    Next is Christmas. And while I won't go as far into it as I did for Thanksgiving, I still plan to eat, drink, and make merry with friends and loved ones. My housemates and I have been invited over to some friends to celebrate. I plan on bringing a traditional Christmas plum pudding and I know I will enjoy myself. Because I have learned, if we view these occasions the right way, there is no reason we can't have a full share.

    Quendi

  • charlie brown jr.
    charlie brown jr.

    Happy Holidays!!!!!!

    And many MORE!!!!

  • Quendi
    Quendi

    I've passed another milestone on my spiritual journey: observing Christmas. I never thought I would do that again and had said as much earlier this year. But my change of heart came as a result of thinking long and hard about what I would and could make of the holiday season. What I came to realize was that its pagan roots should no more matter to me than the pagan beliefs behind wearing wedding rings on the left hand should matter to married couples. It is what the rings mean to the people involved that is important, and the same should hold true for the holidays.

    So I realized that with the end of the year approaching, I had a great deal to be thankful and grateful for. And for many people, that is what the end of the year can mean for them, taking a retrospect over what has happened and how blessed they are. For me, that meant not only giving thanks, but also sharing good food, good drink and good cheer with my freinds and family. So when Thanksgiving came in November, I prepared the feast that I shared with my friends. And when Christmas came, I helped in decorating the house, shared the season's greetings, and, to my great surprise, actually received Christmas gifts from others. Those gifts came as a complete surprise. I'm currently homeless and flat broke so I had nothing to give others except my love, gratitude and good wishes. But that didn't stop my friends from giving to me. I was completely overwhelmed.

    When Jehovah instituted the seasonal festivals among the Israelites he commanded them to 'be nothing but joyful'. And joy is listed as a fruit of the holy spirit. So it occurred to me that being joyful is something we humans need. We need to give and receive it. We need to share it with others. And the holidays are the perfect occasions on which to do this, all the more so at year's end when we can appreciate how blessed we have been. And it felt absolutely wonderful to feel part of something that was good, wholesome, healing and beneficial both to me and those I have come to love and care for.

    The WTS has completely missed the point of holiday celebrations. And for all its talk about Jehovah's Witnesses being a joyful group of people who love each other, the emptiness and cheerlessness of Witness lives comes into sharp focus during the holiday season. I'm so glad I had people to celebrate with this year and will do so for as long as I live.

    This doesn't mean that I'll take up all the holiday celebrations. I still want nothing to do with patriotic ones, and I'm not overly fond of Easter. But birthdays, Father's Day, Mother's Day, Thanksgiving and Christmas are all back on my calendar. So on this, the third day of Christmas (yes, I'm noting the twelve days of Christmas this year), I want to wishe each and every one of you all the love I can.

    Quendi

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