This is a shunning story that was recently conveyed to me by email. I have changed the names/dates to protect the privacy of the individuals.
------------------
Some of the things I've gone through with my mom during my disfellowshipping . . .
She brought all of my brothers and my sister over to my apartment that Thursday they were to announce my disfellowshipping. We made small talk and laughed like we always did and then she cleared her throat. It's a very distinct throat clearing that we all recognize. It means she's upset and about to say something important. A stillness came over the room. Everyone grew uncomfortable and their smiles quickly dissipated. She then lined them up and told them to say good-bye to me because we wouldn't see each other again for a very long time. They each, one by one, hugged me uncomfortably with confused looks on their faces. Emily was 9, Chad 11, Michael 17, (Robert was already out by then and wasn't present). I remember Emily quietly sobbing and clutched my skirt with her little chubby fingers at one point as mom went on about how I had a choice and this is what I chose. I had been looking down during this speech and focused on Emily's fingers. She wore glitter nail polish and had a smiley face drawn on her left thumb by her friends at school earlier that day.
Afterwards, she sent them to the car and said, "I love you, Rebecca. And, I'll be waiting for the day you come back. When that day comes, I'll welcome you with arms wide open just as the prodigal son was joyously received by his father. I'll say, 'This daughter of mine was dead, but has now returned to life. She was once lost, but now is found.' And, then we will have a huge party celebrating your return, but until then you are exactly as the scriptures say... You are dead to me. You made a promise to Jehovah on June 13, 1995 and dedicated your life to serving him; today you have decided to turn your back on God." She then kissed my cheek and walked out the door.
I stood there at the front door with those words ringing in my ears, "Turned your back on God... Dead to me." Slowly, I crumpled to the floor sobbing. I kept replaying all of it over and over in my head... their solemn faces, the coldness in mom's voice. And, then I thought back to those little glitter nails... the hand drawn smiley face. I went back to before the lecture, to the first 15 minutes when we laughed and made small talk. It was the last normal moment I ever had with my family. I drug myself to bed and finally fell asleep thinking of those 15 minutes of laughter and that smiley face on Emily's thumb.
We all have a story. Some are worse than others, but almost everyone leaves someone dear to them behind when they leave this cult. It's heart wrenching, but necessary to live the only life we're given to its fullest. Despite my losses in the process, I aim to do just that.
