Funny field service experiences?

fortis et liber

I know some have been posted before but, one of mine from way (way) back just popped in to my head for some reason and I thought I share…

When I was a young teenager my best JW friend and I were out in field service. It was a gorgeous summer day, late morning and in between doors we were discussing our theocratic plans for the afternoon i.e. swimming in Georgiaville Pond (Smithfield, RI for the curious)…

So we drag our sweaty selves up to the door and my friend, whose turn it was to talk thank Jah, knocks and knocks and then, much to my chagrin, knocks again. This man, justifiably disgruntled, saunters up to the door and with a knowing grin interrupts my friend’s spiel with a succinct “not interested.” My friend had intended to respond with, “I appreciate your being frank” but instead blurted, “thank you for having Frank with us.” If you could have seen the absolute bafflement on this guys face… I just lost it, I tried my damndest oops, I mean hardest to maintain composure but I just burst out laughing and could not stop. I mean, I just could not stop laughing; you know when something is only mildly funny but, because of the circumstance (i.e. you’re not supposed to be laughing) it becomes outrageously funny? Well, here I am sweating I’m laughing so hard and Jess, my friend is just looking at me like, “How can you be losing it here, right now?!” Which only makes the whole scene that much funnier, in my opinion. To top it all off, this guy is now smirking and quietly chuckling to himself, taking great pleasure in the fact that I’m guffawing over her mishap. At this point, Jess starts to crack up herself but before completely losing composure she runs off the stoop with me trailing (and still laughing) not far behind her. We called it a day after that and went swimming.

Also, somewhat unrelated, I was supremely good at doing the “false” doorbell ring; you know, finger apparently on the button, even a slight bend to the digit with a faux-forward ‘pushing’ movement of the hand but alas, it was all a ruse. Anyone else guilty of the faux ring/knock?

NomadSoul

I once wore sneakers to field service. I didn't even notice until an hour later.

bartj

I was with a brother once who fancied himself with the ladies.. Anyway on this porch and out comes this stunning girl in a yellow bikini. My friend had the door and started to stammer while walking backwards until there was no more porch to walk backwards on ! straight of the edge , classic.

flipper

I had 3 really funny field service experiences.

The first one I was standing on the front porch working a rural mountain community standing near a cabin front door. A REAL goat ( the animal ) walked from the yard onto the front porch and started chewing on my Awakes & Watchtowers poking out of my bookbag. I tried shooing it away , but it kept trying to eat my magazines ! Nobody was home and as I started to pull my bag from the goat - he turned around and came back and gored a huge ripping hole in my bookbag ! He was mad I took the magazines away from him ! I was holding my bookbag in front of my groin area when he gored a hole in it. Never thought I'd use a bookbag as a shield !

The second experience I was in my mid 20's and me and another brother in his 20's were knocking at a door where you could see a stairway through the window. After knocking a second time - a very pretty lady with a great body came running down the stairs stark naked ! Nothing showing but her skin and lovely form ! When she saw who we were ( obviously not who she was expecting ) she shook her hands funny , put her hand over her mouth and ran back upstairs giving us a nice view of her behind assets as well ! LOL ! The brother asked me " What should we do ? Should we leave ? " And I said, " No ! This lady needs the good news as well ! Naked or not ! " Then I proceeded to knock one last time ! Needless to say- she didn't answer the door again. LOL !

The third experience I had in my 20's I was working with another brother and we had walked over halfway to a front door in a gated front yard. Suddenly this huge a$$ German Shepherd comes charging at us from the back yard at full speed ! At the same time the brother and I ran as fast as we could and jumped over the 4 foot fence just ahead of the biting dog just in time ! I made it all the way over the fence on one try and landed sprawled out on my back laughing my rear off ! But the other brother got hung up. stuck on top of the fence - so I reached up and pulled him over onto the sidewalk and he came crashing down on the cement ! LOL ! We both laughed and were thankful we didn't get bit by that Shepherd ! So these were my most memorable field service experiences ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

Paralipomenon

I was in service with a buddy of mine and we knock on the door and young boy and girl both answer. The girl is wearing a nice spring dress and the boy in nice khaki pants and a shirt with a collar. Not typically what you meet at the door.

We ask politely if their parents are around and the boy says in a british accent "Our parents aren't home, but Nancy is, we will fetch her" Nancy with a british accent comes out nAHn-see. It's adorable.

Well we figured we had inadvertantely stumbled upon Mary Poppins and the children.

In the background we could softly hear the children call "Nancy, there are people at the door, and they have SHOES!"

Then there's a door slam and heavy feet stomping. Down the stairs comes Nancy. Over six feet tall, built like a linebacker in a massive purple housecoat, matted hair dripping wet.

She barks out in a rough voice "I'm havin' a bath, an' I'm not in de mood"

We depart quickly as she slams the door behind us. Never had I experienced such a difference from what I was expecting to who answered.

dissed

We had a nudist colony in our territory that we would let visiting JW's take the door without telling them.

finallyfree!

our hall had an indian reserve to cover. needless to say they were very receptive and since it was catholic territory lol! the priest got the whole church riled up. when we got into the rez there were 2 truckloads full of po'ed indians that drove us off the reserve and said never to come back onto their land.

id have done the same thang!

fortis et liber

Guys, all of these stories are so funny; thanks for sharing them !

Flipper, the mag eating goat had me really laughing and Paralipomenon, the vision I had in my head of Nancy both the imagined and 'real' was too much !

~ Fortis

william hahn

I have had heeps of funny and unusual experiences out in FS when i was a JW- its suprising how you can make your own fun when your utterly bored going door to door.

Well 3 things happened in one morning in FS when the CO visited our cong. I grabbed one of my mates for door to door as you dont want to get stuck with an oldie ( i was 17 then) so we made sure we were one of last to leave to drive to territory(like we own it?) and detoured via McDonalds so we were thus late for meeting on territory.Last street to go i saw a gap in traffic and thumped the accelerator and having a reasonably hoted up car did a massive burnout accross traffic up a short rise in the rode and on the other side stood nearly the whole cong looking at who the maniac was driving.Like Jim Carey i coudnt lie IT WAS ME!!!!!. The CO asked why we were late so i told him we dropped into a call on the way (liar liar pants on fire or what).So that was event no1.

Event no 2 .We jumped at joining in a group of the keen beans out to impress the CO you know the type almost running from door to door with eager anticipation to be told to bugger off.I pic ked them because its a sinch to find a house with no one home so you can loiter a good 10 min then walk to catchup with the goodies.Well we found one such door early in our efforts and it had a musical tune.We waited about a minute doing the usual and i pressed it again and it was a different melody! Awesome we kept pressing untill we got back to the original tune ( there was about 24 different ones)and decided we better get going so started walking away when the front door opened behind us,we turned and it was this really big really angry guy.He just glared at us and we took off laughing.Poor next JW who called on him.He should of answered the door we were only a couple of teenagers.

Event 3.Bad Kharma-again.We caught up writing on door to door slip to look good.The next house had a long driveway with a gate at the front so we went in abou 50-60meters and just got to the house when 4 blue cattle dogs ( australian invention of a pretty nasty dog that will takes on cows) can running from behind the house .I just said run and we sprinted down the driveway and just cleared the gate whe one of the faster dogs bite my friends bag as he jumped the gate and spilled his bible and a few mags in the driveway which the dogs tore up and carried off to there house.Amazing how much real intelligence animals have!That was really enough for one day so we said were doing some calls and went to Dee Why beach instead.

I will try and remember some more.Hell we should paste everyones expereiences into a handbook for young JW so they can have the wealth of our experiance.

william hahn

Sorry all i really need to use spellcheck or not type when im tired.What would my mother say? Oh thats right she cant talk to her own son now.

Funny field service experiences?

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