My wife and kids are inactive/trying to fade - see my previous posts for our story - last meeting for me was over 5 years ago.
In laws and parents active - FIL and Dad are elders, FIL and MIL are pioneers, Mom just follows Dad's lead.
Anyway, my wonderful Son is finishing up college and is engaged to be married later in 2011 to a beautiful young woman who we all love dearly and have welcomed to our family. Ceremony to be held in a public space - no denominational identity. When engagement announced, my wife and I's parents reacted positively and assured their attendance.
However, phone calls a few days after the Elders school over Xmas advised us that they would NOT be attending since our Son - although inactive - is baptized and his fiancee is not a JW. Unevenly yoking and with new info from the school - they cannot attend.
Needless to say, we are upset. My Wife, Daughter and Son have shed many tears, his fiancee doesn't understand and thinks they hate her etc... I expected this actually and have tried to smooth it over. I likened this whole episode to a box full of pictures of our lives that will just be missing some photos of the wedding - but doesn't mean the other pics are gone...
I spoke to my parents and told them I wasn't too upset, but the rest of my family is - Mom says she wishes there was another way and that they dearly love us and our soon to be daughter-in-law. My Mom is so upset that she cannot be at her grandson's wedding. My comment to them was that they chose to be JW's and choose to put a religion ahead of family and that choice has consequences.
You see, so many times we hear from our JW friends and relatives that our leaving is our choice and any separation from family is our fault - well, I will have NONE of that anymore. our JW families CHOOSE to be in that religion. they CHOOSE to put that religion/cult ahead of family - so they are the ones losing out - NOT US! My comments on this was shocking to my parents - they don't get it. They are so blinded that they cannot see things from another point of view - so selfish.
JWs have no respect for the beliefs (or non beliefs) of others. It is all one sided - their side. I say, we all need to stand up and not be continually degraded, gulted into thinking our leaving is the reason our relationships have been destroyed. Jehovah's Witness are the reason families are hurt, broken up, destroyed. It is they who have chosen.
My wife says she will not answer her parents or my parents phone calls anymore. Time will tell how long that lasts, but part of me agrees - let them feel the power of shunning. We are shunning them from our lives - we are in control. They choose religion - we choose our family.
I post this because it is a way to vent and also hear your thoughts on this topic - it helps to find clarity and reason amidst the travesty that follows anyone who is or has been part of this destructive cult.