I would answer it this way, you don't need a church or building to tell God that you love him and will worship him. After being out for almost 25 years, I still remember the scripture where it says - "where three or more are gathered in my name, there my Spirit is." The society does'nt like that scripture, because they want you to eat their spiritual food at the meeting. The things that are very important to me is my meditating on only the bible and on prayer. What if you lived out west in the 1800's living in the middle of nowhere, no church building to go to, but most families did have a Bible. People then would just get together for a little reading.
As the world turns, you have a terrible culture that is corrupting so much out there, Middle- East still with no peace, Koreas both arguing and vamping up arms, the extreme weather in all parts of world, disrespect and disunity in goverment, Television which has baby sat us with rot-gut, and all forms of technology to take over all aspects of our life, the addiction of the internet on how to mess up your life, (98% bad-2% good for medicine technology), failng economies, people out of work, and broken up family unit with no togetherness.
So I ask myself: Why would I not want to have God (Jehovah) there for me? But it is certainly understandable why People have a disdain for Jehovah, from what I've been reading, because they are frustrated at the way God is running things. Well guess what! How do you think Jehovah feels after his Name has been abused, disrespected, cursed, worse yet spoken for when he was not speaking. As they like to say "its Jehovah's spirit appointed spokesman. The payment for there actions will come. So Wobble, from what I gather from your writings, I don't think you are a lost soul, but you will find.
"Happy Trails" Truth and Justice