What I don't regret about my experience with JW's

by tec 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • exwhyzee

    Im glad you asked this as I was thinking of asking this same question. My posts have often stressed the negative side of my experiemce as a JW. adn to be fair...there were good things.

    I don't regret that taking care of the gift of life and ones body was stressed so much. As a result I'm not some jaded burn-out...rather, people always assume I'm much younger than I am and are always suprised when they find out my age. They say I've got good genes but I know it's also that I lived a clean life and haven't been kicked around by the world as much as I may have been.

    I don't regret that I was able to know some very decent trusting people. They were willing to put their money where their mouth is when it came to living up to the principals they believed in as they were led to understand them.

    I don't regret that I'm not afraid to speak in front of a crowd or walk up to a stranger and start a conversation.

    I don't regret that in regard to material things " keeping one's eye simple" was stressed. I own everything I have and have no debts because I followed this advice.

  • tec

    Thanks for sharing that, Exwhyzee.

    Its better to trust in Jesus, than in an Organization - Jaguarbass.


  • garyneal

    There's certainly good and bad in this religion as there is in everything in life.

    I was certainly attracted to the good aspects of it. Their love of the Bible, their 'unity' in their worship, their 'unity' in their brotherhood, the fact that their congegrations were largely interracial. Their knowledge of certain facts (like Christmas and other holidays and their origins). They certainly had me believing that this religion could indeed be the truth or at the very least they were a bunch of sincere people trying live as close to the Bible as possible.

    But the more they try to whitewash themselves and hide their past, the harder it is for people (like myself) who later discover the truth about the 'truth.' The more we begin to see their 'unity' for what it really is (conformity). And the more we see the consequences of what happens when we question whether or not certain teachings truly originated in the Bible.

    The result for some of us is we dig into the Bible even deeper to discover what it is really saying. For others, we take the strictly objective approach and ultimately question even the validity of the Bible itself, along with other religious texts.

    I think as long as we find freedom and contentment in the end, then the journey is well worth it. It's just too bad that for some, the cost of that freedom is very high.

  • not a captive
    not a captive


    I just want to copy your post word for word. Reading through it twice, it represents my feelings and thoughts so well that anything I would say would just be repeating you.

    That comment especially about mistaking the conformity that molded us in so many ways and was foisted off as "unity". So true.

    I read in a book once that referenced words of Jesus from scripture that never made it to the canon. In it Jesus is looking at a dead jackal its lips in a death grimace. Instead of making a disparaging comment, he remarked "Look how bright his teeth are!"

    It is okay to see the good in a thing that has harmed us.

    P.S. But it's hard to bury the jackal decently in a sheep herder's camp.

  • Quandry


    If you can look back on the experience and not just feel anger, then good for you. Perhaps that means that you are healing nicely.

    I guess I could say that I wanted to serve God so much that I quit smoking, although I probably would have eventually anyway, I don't know...but the negatives still vastly outweigh the positives for me. I was "in" over thirty years. Now, my huband and I are "dangerous" so we are unofficially shunned. All the friends I had in my adult life are no longer there. It is hard to start over in your fifties. Also, no money for retirement was put away, as of course, we would not die. And my husband worked at low-paying jobs so that he, as an elder, wouldn't miss meetings. Mostly he was self-employed, doing auto interior work, until he could no longer take the heat and cold and physical work.

    I wanted to go to school, but of course, that might not have looked encouraging to others in the congo, so I couldn't do that. Now, I'm in college at 58, but probably won't be able to finish before Alzheimer's sets in!

  • not a captive
    not a captive

    Quandry--You Go Girl! I'm your age. That is impressive--some other poster said a while back that being older and getting out of College gave them an edge job-hunting--Everyone thoght that they had a lot of experience in the field because they were older than the other applicants! Hope it works out.

    Thinking about the good of the JW experience is like the joke

    ---Q.Why is hitting yourself over the head with a 2x4 so great?

    A.It feels so good when you stop!

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007

    The one thing I dont regret is as a Pioneer spending peoples "donations" for literature on McDonalds lunches! A lady gave me $10 bucks! Mmmmm two Big Macs.

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