To Those who are DF'd or DA'd: Is there anything that you wish you could have said in your JC?

by african GB Member 18 Replies latest jw experiences

  • african GB Member
    african GB Member

    Do you regret not having said it since you can't be afforded the opportunity now?

  • sd-7
    sd-7

    It would have involved expletives, and I wanted to conclude matters honorably, as I felt they'd dealt with me as honorably as their cult-trained consciences would have allowed. So...apart from words I don't wish to repeat, nah. Not unless it was to quote Captain Picard, post-Cardassian interrogation: "There are FOUR LIGHTS!"

  • nelly136
    nelly136

    no but with hindsight it would have been nice to know that i could have said absolutely nothing and not feel obliged to answer personal questions asked by a landscape gardener and a window cleaner about things that had absolutely jack smit to do with them.

    no disrespect to any window cleaners or gardeners here or in general intended.

  • its_me!
    its_me!

    I mostly just wish that I wouldn't have met with them at all. It didn't matter what I had to say anyway, I think that they already had their minds made up. I wish that I had not answered all of their perverted questions, which were completely unnecessary, and I guess I wish that I would have told them that they reminded me of the Pharisees I had read about in the bible.

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft

    Oh heck yes there's loads ...let me think about it !

    Loz x

  • Twitch
    Twitch

    Not DF or DA officially but had a "meeting with 3" who laid out the law when I was a naughty boy and later blacklisted me from the podium, so,....

    For a long time I carried a grudge and wished I had said certain things to them at the time. Now I no longer care and it's a good feeling.

    BTW, one of the three who was/is a family "friend" now suffers from brain damage of a sort and is a shell of the "man" he once was. You might say there was a time when it would've made my heart glad to hear this news and you'd be right but that time has passed. Despite any grievances I may have had or issues with his so-called "authority", I feel kinda bad that his family has to deal with it. But then the feeling passes,...

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    I didn't have a JC because I DA'd. My letter said it all. Anything more would have just been a rant.

    W

  • IronHill
    IronHill

    I feel the same as Finally_Free...i explained some of my reasons in the letter, but not all because I wanted them to read it. I made my peace!

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft

    Damn the site ate my big reply...will try again..

    For a start I wouldnt have made the confession which got me into the JC but that done I'd have insisted on having everything before and during in writing or recorded. I would have refused to have one elder who had big issues with me on the JC too. Mine consisted of 3 two hour sessions which reduced me to an awful mess when the stress in my life was already severe. I wrote a long detailed letter of appeal but ...they wanted to then bring in another 3 elders so it would have been 6 of them attacking me through further sessions and I really couldnt go through anymore.

    I wrote to the BOE about some concerns re my daughter who was still attending the hall following my Dfshpg, and it took them 5 MONTHS to come and see me at my home. I asked why it took so long and they said they had to come since the CO was due the following week!! One of them asked me about coming back to the hall and I said ' But if you didnt believe I was sorry how could you possibly believe it if I came back? Its the same 'sorry' so how could it change or you change your views?' No answer. I told them I could never trust that I would never be so ill treated in the future.

    I allowed my 14 year old daughter to continue to attend on the basis that I didnt want to take her 'spiritual' life away from her. What a mistake. When she was 16 my older kids hatched a plan, she asked me if she could go and stay with my older 'spiritual' daughter miles away to be able to attend an excellent 6th form college and experience the lifestyle in that area...it all seemed so innocent...we made plans for visits etc but despite these and hers and the older kids promises...when she got there she cut me off and wont see or talk to me since. At 16 there is little I can enforce even if I felt it would be of any benefit. So I've lost her.

    Can any ex elders please tell me what happens to letters sent to the BOE from individuals? Do they read them out to the body? Is any notice taken of them? If the sender is Dsfshpd does that alter things ? Thx.

    Loz x

  • Peaches1978
    Peaches1978

    I wish I could say something to all 5 of them.. but guess what there all dead.....who's laughing now bastards..... i got df'd with out proof.. just specalation....

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