I've started drinking again. Just now. I stopped for a month but I gave in again. Sorry I'm writing it here but who else am I going to tell? God? I need a way to stop painful thoughts without drugs and alcohol.
life=pain
by paul from cleveland 26 Replies latest jw friends
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FreudianSlip
Alcohol is a depressant. What's causing your pain?
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paul from cleveland
Guilt. I'm haunted by the things I've done.
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FreudianSlip
Guilt can eat at you like few other things. Anything you can talk about here?
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noni1974
I'm not much for prayer but I think of this one often. I've never been in a 12 step program but this helps me in my life too. I hope it helps you. Please read it and learn from it. I really like the first verse.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen. -
paul from cleveland
Sure, what difference does it make now... I've taken a wrecking ball to my life by cheating on my partner. I've hurt the person that means everything to me. We're no longer together and now I have forever to think about the consequences of my actions.
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Snoozy
I would apologize, learn from my mistake and move on, determined not to make the same mistake twice.
As far as the drinking goes..they used to say two wrongs don't make a right.
Snoozy...
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poopsiecakes
It sucks that you're going through this. We all make mistakes and do stupid things sometimes. While you can't change the past, going forward this may help. It was posted on another thread today.
agreement 1
Be impeccable with your word - Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
agreement 2
Don’t take anything personally - Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
agreement 3
Don’t make assumptions - Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
agreement 4
Always do your best - Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
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paul from cleveland
Thanks Noni and poopsicakes. If it's any consolation to those whom have been cheated upon, being the cheater is a horribly painful experience. Yes, I did the wrong thing and I've been paying for it for years. Guilt and self loathing.
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paul from cleveland
Anyway, I'm going to bed now. It's 2:15am here and this glass of wine has made me tired. Thank you for listening.