Funniest Talk or Weird Things That Happened In Your Hall.

by Nephilim 27 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Nephilim

  There is always at least 2 or 3 REALLY crazy persons in the Kingdom Hall. The kind of person that when they raise their hand the speaker on stage knows he's taking a gamble if he calls on them - yet he can't discriminate.

  Anyhow, I remember one time a younger brother was doing sound and one of those crazy brothers was about to give his 5 minute talk (I forget what number that was, prior to them just reading scripture). The crazy brother slipped the young brother doing sound a CD and said "play this when I get on stage".

  Well, he gets up on stage and all of a sudden hawaiian music starts playing... The man on stage just starts dancing. This lasted for 2 minutes until brothers scrambled to turn it off.

  There really was no point to the hawaiian music or the dancing. The talk went on about some boring scripture and I think his point was that it's good to "lighten things up" sometimes.

  ANOTHER time, a brother (who was a little off but brave) was doing a talk on friendship. He was not a MS or an Elder but on stage he talked about a perfect world where everyone got along. The he talked about how sometimes persons forget to invite people, or purposely leave people out of their "groups". I'll never forget when he dropped the bomb. "I'm TALKING TO YOU ELDERS". "The elders in this congregation are THE most unfriendly, thoughtless, and careless people I have ever met! You should be ashamed of yourselves." This was in the main hall not some back room. So you could see brothers running up to other brothers kneeling over to talk to them prior to the talk finally finishing with the man on stage crying.

  The school teacher said, "We're pressed for time, so I will go over your talk with you after the meeting".

  When he said "I" he meant 4 other brothers with him.

  I know I'm not the only one with crazy comments overheard, or bizzare talks. LET ME HEAR YOUR STORIES!
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  flipper

  I $hit my pants while giving a public talk. Just joking. But seriously, there was an elder giving a slide presentation who was pretty liberal. To emphasize not growing old in the paradise he played Neil Young's song " Old Man " during the talk and ened the talk with Neil's song " Heart of Gold " LOL ! It was pretty hilarious actually. I' m a big Neil Young fan- so I kind of dug it . Pretty cool
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  cofty

  A visiting speaker started his public talk by getting a camera out his pocket and taking 2 or 3 pics of the audience. I was expecting it to turn into some kind of illustration but it didn't. He just put the camera away and carried on with his talk like nothing odd had just happened
• 

  dissed

  Weird stuff, in a KH??!!

  The strangest for us? We were visiting my sister in laws KH and the concluding part on the Service meeting used to be just announcements. The Bro, an Elder, doing the part, reccomended to all to do extra research and read books on philosophy. This went on for 20 minutes.

  Being ubber dubs then, we were upset. But after the meeting, JW's were asking him for the name of books to study, including my in law.

  I asked one of the Elders I knew what he thought of the impromtu talk and he said, 'he hadn't noticed, he was working on something with another Elder.'

  I swear, it felt like we were in the Twilight Zone.

  To no ones surprise, he left the JW's soon after and became a Chiropracter.
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  cofty

  I was school overseer when the talk was assigned on masturbation. The bro who got the assignment started off with "OK if anybody does not have a problem with masturbation they can leave now" Everybody shuffled in their seats and stared at the pattern on the carpet. "Right then," he went on "it looks like we all need to listen to this talk"

  He then went on to say that it was only a matter of time before it was a df offence, that got a few worried looks!

  I can't remember how many Ws he got for that one.
• 

  EmptyInside

  Actually, the strangest talk I heard was from a Circuit Overseer about "sex" demons. I kid you not. I, still to this day, do not understand the purpose of that talk.
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  baltar447

  Wow, some really funny stuff in here! I'm LOL'ing my butt off.
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  juci32

  good stories! Thanks for the laughs.
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  mythreesons

  One time we had a "local needs" part on the service meeting about swearing/cussing...and how we shouldn't do it. The brother said, "words like sh*t, D*mn, Hell, B*tch....should not be used" he actually said the words. I had a smile on my face for the next few months from that one.

  We also had a brother who gave a talk on masturbation ....his speech counsel point he was working on was Gestures. I never would have been allowed to be on stage again had I given that talk and worked on that point. Whew!!

  We also had an old elder give the "Godly view of Sex and Marriage" talk one Sunday when I was in my late teens and then again the subject of masturbation was addressed. The elder giving the talk said that he'd even heard of married men having a problem with masturbation, then he said "Brothers if you have a problem with this, what does it say about your wife"....you could actually hear the air go out of the hall after he said that. :)
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  Nephilim

  Oh! I remember one time there was a talk on "VPL"... visible panty line. Hahahaha