What's the silliest, funniest, stupidest, most embarassing thing you ever did on the platform?

by dissed 10 Replies latest jw friends

  • dissed

    Its Friday evening and after being trapped in our home all week with over 2 meters (6 ft) of snow on the ground and more coming.......

    I feel the need to get a little silly.

    So, as no one here really knows me, I can share one of lifes embarassing moments from the KH. Seeing as it's my question, I get to go first.

    During the Bible review, I accidentally used the S**t word. My wife gave me a "WTH" look. I shrugged my shoulders back, "Like sorry!" Just then an elderly JW sister laughed. But NO ONE responded or noticed, so I just continued on.

    After the meeting, we had a brief Elders business meeting, where I apologized. "Sorry brothers, it was an accident!" But none of them heard it! (Elders never listen to the talks, no?)

    As it turned out, only my wife and that elderly one heard my little indiscretion.

    So what does that tell me? That I'm one heck of a boring speaker and no one listens or nobody listens to these parts anyway?

    Please add your moment or something you witnessed (of course we know it was really you)

  • crapola

    I was giving a #3talk in the back school and got tickled over something and could not stop laughing. The bro. conducting the school finally had to tell me to shut up. That worked!

  • Think About It
    Think About It

    In a public talk, I once said OMG when describing my reaction to something shocking I had seen. One theocratic clone elder said he was offended. I was embarassed to have been associated with such kooks.

  • jookbeard

    all of my unprepared talks.

    slightly off topic on stupidest things I've heard from the platform; we had a visiting speaker called John Bentley and he visited the Sunday(1987) after the UK had been battered by the worst hurricane in history, some of his opening words were"fine weather we've been having lately" idiot,boring as hell also.

    We had another speaker a fine orator by the name of Denis Ashby, and he got on the subject of The Archbishop of Canterbury Terry Waite who went on a peace mission to Lebanon during the height of the troubles and was kidnapped and held for years, this is 100% true, he said "brothers we should pray for the release of Terry Waite" the local circuit was in uproar he was removed as an elder and banned from everything. I kid you not, he was my kind of guy old Dennis.

  • rabidewok

    My brother-n-law once used the word screwy or screwie however you spell it. I once panicked and lost my breath during the watchtower reading, ( i was the reader) and walked off of the stage. I was so embarrassed and the person who gave the talk had to finish as the watchtower reader. I used to get panic attacks i was so afraid of public speaking.

  • dissed

    Crapola - I had a young bro do that on me. Once young myself, I knew someone had to be making him laugh, so I turned around and saw 3 of his buddies in the back making 'goo goo' faces at him. On seeing me, you could read the lips of one, "We've been busted" I laughed. (we used to do the same things to our buds)

  • sooner7nc

    My best friend, since passed away, used to flip me off while I was giving talks. He would pretend to scratch his nose but use the middle finger and leave it there for a long time. I sure miss that asshole.


    dissed, your story made me laugh out loud. I probably would have caught that, not because I listened to the talks, but because I definitely have an ear for catching swear words in places they shouldn't be.

    I didn't ever do anything too bad. I was always too nervous to do much of anything, I'm sure I seemed like a robot. I did one time pick up and start talking in a completely wrong spot, I was my mom's householder so she had to fix it. Haha.

  • WTWizard

    Showing up for the talk. Especially when the talk was about something the hounders knew was going to be a trap for me, and they gave me the damn talk anyways. That was stupid--I would have been better off to skip the boasting session altogether.

  • dissed

    rabidewok - nervous?

    I hated giving talks because I got so nervous, man was that stressful. Sooo glad I don't have to do that anymore.

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