My hypocrite JW family
Recently my mum told her jw family that she was DA'ing herself and why. As you can imagine, they were not happy and the shunning has begun (not to mention one of her sisters sending her a horrible letter and the other sister spitting vitriol and hatred down the phone at her - very Christian).
Now, if my mum's family were totally upright, loyal and zealous witnesses the shunning would still be horrible but somehow easier to bear - at least you could respect their consistency. But the fact is, one of her sisters has covered up and made excuses for years for the immoral and wayward behavoiur of her own children, proudly declaring 'no one (meaning the GB) tells me what to do'. The other (pompous, self-righteous) sister and her husband have defied the WT society for years by still having a very close relationship with their disfellowshipped daughter (he had to step down as an elder over it). Bear in mind their daughter is married to a hostile non-jw and she celebrates birthdays, Christmas etc. And to top it all, the DF daughter (my mum's niece) is also treating us as though we don't exist, even though we ourselves never shunned her and have always been supportive of her through the years! The bloody cheek of it all!!!
So we are being shunned by a load of hypocrites and a disfellowshipped person! If it wasn't causing my mum such pain it would actually be quite hilarious.
Your thread title could have been written by me. Then again, your whole thread could have been written by me.
I am so very sorry you and your Mom are dealing with this. This is not uncommon at all within the JW bOrg. The DFd cousin/niece is a new one. I have a DFd cousin who will speak to me at least.
JW thrive on thier sence of superiority so it was so it will always be. Having said this I'm sorry you and you mother are going though this I know it hurts but it get's better with time I promise.
BORGHATER- I'm so sorry you and your mom are being treated this way. I am shunned by some JW relatives as well . I just look at it as they are mentally ill. They really are. They are under " cult mind control" to act like boorish sucking louses who are emotional vampires that suck our energy out of us. What has helped me is re-connecting with former non-witness friends and ex-witness friends who got out of the cult. Hopefully you and your mom can make a network of new friends. That's one suggestion I have for you. Hang in there, tell your mom we are thinking of her, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
Thanks for your kind words guys, much appreciated My mum has already met some really nice people at her local church who have been very kind and supportive (but not in a pushy, love-bombing way) and has also been supported by some really lovely ex-witness so it all helps to lessen the blow of losing her family (i know not everone is as lucky to find friendship so quickly outside of the Borg). And of course, where would we be without this brilliant forum?
Sorry to hear your troubles. Strength to you and yours in your endeavors.
What a coincidence!
Our families are very similar.
My uncle and aunt are JW's, nice enough people.
They will not talk to us, although technically, we have not been DF'd.
All 4 of their kids are DF'd and they will talk to 3 of them but not the oldest, and forces the 3 youngest to avoid the oldest. And why?
The oldest was recently DF'd after being active for several years.
The middle two fell away to gangs, drugs, etc......several years ago. The youngest decided the WTS was not the way of life for her and quit.
They are very disappointed in the oldest and want her back. The youngest they have given up on and accept the fact THEY are not coming back.
So.......they are trying to punish and shame the oldest, using the youngest as tools. What's really odd, is they, the young ones are cooperating fully with them and REFUSE to talk to their oldest sister??!!
I asked one of them why......and she said, "I can't talk to her because she's DF'd" (This is when I started to bang my head against the wall)
Their older sister is REALLY depressed and her siblings won't give her any support.
(He pauses and takes a deep breath) I hate the GB for creating this unscriptual use of shunning!!
They are such hypocrites. One elder ,who is so high and mighty, his son was caught going to brothels and only spoke to the elders when someone told on him. He got privately approved (he was sorry), and his father step down as an elder, for only 6 MONTHS. Another elder, his 18 year old daughter was caught drink driving, but no-one found out so nothing happened to that family. My daughter told the elders (before coming to me, I would've told her to not say anything), that she and her fiance slept together and she felt bad as he was going to get baptised and they ended up disfellowshiping her. Very loving and christian. I'm getting angry now thinking about it!!!!!!!!!!!! That was nearly 5 years ago. I haven't been back after I had plenty to say!!! My daughter got married (too soon) and is now re-instated. I feel so sorry for her.