Can A SIngle Person Ever Be As Happy As An Attached Person?

by wouldacouldashoulda 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • wouldacouldashoulda

    Do we as humans need the love of a signifcant other to be truly complete?

    I was born single and then got married. Despite going thru a divorce my happiest days were whilst courting and married.


  • OnTheWayOut

    It depends on the person. Some people are very happy by themself. Most seem to want that significant other.

    You were born single? Really? How unusual.

  • the real life
    the real life

    I think people need companionship and friends and it's a special gift to have an intimate companion. Everyone's needs are different. If you feel that you were happiest when you were with someone, maybe that's what you need. However, I do believe that a person must be happy and confident alone before they can truly be happy in a couple. Otherwise, the relationship becomes unbalanced when one or both partners are constantly seeking fulfillment from the other. Two solid individuals are what make happy couples. Best, AP

  • wantstoleave

    The real life put it perfectly. One must be content within themselves, otherwise they will always look to someone, whether partner or friend, to build them up and make them feel worthwhile. So you have to be happy within yourself before you can become attached to someone else.

    As for people needing someone, yes and no. Some people definitely need companionship and the love of another. Others don't. Some are happiest when they have close friends, yet can maintain their independance. While others enjoy coming home to someone and 'growing old 'together. We are each different, with different needs.

  • yknot

    Welcome The Real Life....

    Well said too!

  • AdaMakawee

    I've been single for three years now and truthfully these have been the happiest years of my life. Do I see myself with a companion again? Perhaps, but I'm not going to stress about it, because if the worst thing that can happen is me being by myself I'm pretty good with that. Everyone is different, but I think many people fear being alone. I agree with what Real Life said (welcome to JWN).


  • WTWizard

    People that find that marriage is a trap are usually affected by stagnation ruts (as is the case of most of us). Sometimes it is possible to get stuck with someone that is incompatible (this is a whopper of a problem with the witlesses)--a tyrant with a wife that needs a little freedom is a prime example. And, in those cases, it is best to end it in divorce (or to run a trial, complete with fornication, before finalizing anything so the losses can be cut if it doesn't work).

    But, if one has zero prospects, one is losing out on the chance to make it work. And, to the extent that God (or religion, or both) has anything to do with one having no prospects, that only serves to prove that Jehovah is nothing more than an Almighty Sore Loser hellbent on stifling happiness, promising deliverance with no intention of actually doing it, and creating these stagnation ruts and taboos in the first place. And preventing people from being as happy as they could be.

  • Finally-Free

    I've been single for nearly 6 years now. For the first time in my life I feel "complete". I can't imagine myself in a relationship again.


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