Does your JW family exhaust you?

LucyA

I’ve kind of been lurking on this website for a month and I’ve decided to introduce myself so a little background. I was born and raised JW at about the age of sixteen I started to have doubts about my mothers chosen religion (dad is not JW) so started to do some research and decided it wasn’t for me. My mothers still at me about going back though. So both my sisters are out and my brothers still in along with his wife and child.

So to the question above I love my mother and brother don’t get me wrong but sometimes when I spend time with them I leave these encounters so tired that I feel like I could sleep for days. My sisters tell me I’m being to sensitive that mother and brother aren’t going to change and I should just let it go. Does anyone else get like this? Am I being to sensitive like my sisters say?

TheSilence

Well, what about it exhausts you? If it is because you are trying to talk them out of their beliefs then I am inclined to agree with your sister. Let them live their lives believing what they believe, just as you expect them to let you live yours believing what you believe. If you are exhausted because they are always trying to talk you into coming back then I would say you are not being too sensitive at all. It can be exhausting to feel like you always have to justify your choices and who you are.

Jackie

Rocky_Girl

I can be overwhelmed by my parents when they start pushing me to return. They are, at times, so intent on 'saving' me that they don't see that I don't need to be saved. The Witness instinct is to convert constantly. My mother especially lays the guilt trips on me. I.e. "I don't want to watch you and my precious grandsons die at Armageddon" and "you know it is the truth, you just don't feel worthy" or my fave "can't you remember how much you enjoyed pioneering? You were so zealous"

It has gotten better in time, but it takes a lot of patience from you. I had such a hard time not exploding with all of the information I found about JWs. I knew that I would destroy any chance of maintaining a relationship with them if I went crazy with the real truth about their truth. It is worth slugging through it, though. I didn't think a loving relationship could develop when I was forced to restrain my thoughts and feelings, but my folks and I are getting closer and avoid religious discussions at all costs.

Hope this helps. Hang in there and come on here to vent when you need to so it is easier to deal with the pressure with them.

Angie

White Dove

Welcome to the board, Lucy:)

I tell you, when I'm with my mom, I cannot breathe! She will nag me to death about all things JW: service, meeting attendance, showing proper respect to her, etc. If I tell her that I don't want to talk about something, she thinks I said that I want to hear more about it. Nag nag nag. It drives me batty!

flipper

LUCY A- Welcome to the board ! You are among friends. Yes- Some of my JW family exhaust me- especially the ones who try to manipulate me by their odd reasonings on things. Or if they try to " guilt " me into going back to meetings - it can get trying sometimes. I just switch the conversation onto a non-witness topic like the weather or family stuff or the latest movie I've watched. ANYTHING but JW topics. You might try this and see what happens ! Good luck, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

LucyA

Thanks everyone

Silence I long ago realised that you cant force somone to see what they dont want too and my mothers been in to long to bother trying.

Scarred for life

Yes.

It is exhausting to constantly be thinking of topics to talk about that will not offend them. I can't talk about Christmas. I can't talk about my church activities. I can't talk about my daughter's Christian school. I can't talk about my older daughter's mission trip to Cambodia. I can't talk about many of the movies I have watched.

I do not want to hear any preaching from them. I don't want to hear about their assemblies or meetings or field service. I don't want to hear about how the family found "the truth". And since my mother died I have been vocal about this so I don't hear from them anymore and I don't care.

In my case I am not talking about immediate family. It's all aunts and uncles and cousins. And I don't care if they are in my life or not. We have nothing in common.

Tuesday

Oh I hear you, avoiding the elephant in the room is a difficult thing.

mindmelda

It's so much easier around non-Witnesses, isn't it? You don't have to guard everything you say for fear of triggering a spew of Witnessing or offending them by mentioning some normal thing everyone else does but they don't.

JustHuman14

Don't push them...the worst thing to do it is to attack JW's faith. Just let it go, or try small things, one at a time if you wanna help them. Other wise is a waste of time. They are the ones that have to realize that they are living in the WT's Matrix

Does your JW family exhaust you?

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