by badboy 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • badboy


  • zombie dub
    zombie dub

    make it from toilet paper?

  • Mickey mouse
  • Outaservice

    Well, they might start with some windows!


  • Farkel

    Install a back door exit in the JC room so you can bolt when the elders are pissing you off

    Put the stage and podium 15 feet below the floor so no one can see you when you give your talks

    Install "mute" buttons on all the chairs, so dubs can shut up boring speakers at meetings

    Install video games in the bathroom

    Have a drive-up window for the literature counter. Insist on using it to have JC meetings you don't want to attend.

    Have vending machines outside for the literature when you don't even want to go to the drive-up window to pick up your supply.

    Install runner starting blocks at the back of the Kingdom Hall to give the mic handlers a feeling of importance

    Install a drinking fountain that dispenses beer for voluntary donations

    Install buzzers like the ones used on "Jeopardy" for the audience to determine who gets called on first

    Install a recreation room complete with pool tables and ashtrays so dubs can take a "break" from the talks that are boring

    Put a concrete dividing wall right down the middle of the hall. On one side the "spiritually strong" are seated and the "spiritually weak" are seated on the other side. That way, you won't have to pretend there is caste system in the KH anymore.

    Have a 4' by 10' unheated room with fold-down cots hung on the wall (prison style) where the CO will have to stay during his visits. This will save a lot of money and make anyone think twice about ever wanting to become a CO.

    Make the entire KH out of straw in order to conform to Jesus' description of the JW religion.


  • Japster

    wine cellar [all bottles with twist of caps for quick access] in the basement or 'back room'

    judge ruuuuuther foooord would appove

    and it would difinitely improve the quality of the 'meetin's'


  • WTWizard

    First, I would blow the whole thing up. Those things are p*** poor quality in workmanship and materials, and are a potential hazard for both safety and fire--blowing them up would solve that problem.

    After blowing them up, put something worthwhile in their place--like a dentist's office, a porn studio (that way, children would know they are getting sexually explicit material), a small business office, or a real apartment. Put in some damn windows (that open), install the best air conditioning and heating system possible (that way, they cost less to operate and conk out much less than the crap ones they now have), and install better lighting (that is, lighting that does not induce headaches).

    If they are not going to blow it up first, I would just let the rats and mice claim the building. However, that might be an insult to the rats and mice.

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007

    Spanking room with torture equipment......sorry, only for the kids of course!

  • badboy

    interesting suggestions

  • AllTimeJeff

    I hear they like lit candles during the meetings, a lot.

Share this