I was raise to be a JW but fortunately I was able to brake free of their mind control. When I was growing up my personalty often clashed with the JW lifestyle. I tried so hard to find peace, I tried doing as I was told only to end up disappointed and feeling empty. When I had questions that I knew were taboo I felt like something was wrong with me, like if Satan was trying to "get me". This, as most of you know, is a terrible feeling for a child. Now I know that it is the leaders that have something wrong with them, they want to create you into their slave in order to create more and more because they can not give up this feeling of power, they are self appointed gods and they want your unquestioning devotion.
Ask yourself why do they tell you not to do independent research. Ask your self why they tell you to stay clear of places like this. If the have the truth as they say why does it change and why do they not want you to ask certain questions. Simple to answer, they fear to lose what the have gained, your devotion. It's not Satan that is out to get you, it is the WTBTS.
Do not be afraid to be yourself, do not be afraid to express your emotions. Enjoy your life, we are all lucky to be alive and it would be a terrible thing to waste this life on a simple printing company, because that's what the WTBTS is in reality.