Does anyone have a working link for Preparing for Child custody

by wherehasmyhairgone 11 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • FlyingHighNow

    Having been through these things myself, I ask you: why are you battling with your ex over custody? Really. You should examine your own reasons for this pursuit. Sometimes the end results are not really what you would end up liking the best. More questions:

    • Do you realize how painful this will be for all involved, including grandparents, other relatives, friends, but most of all you, your ex and your children?
    • Is she abusive?
    • Is she a good mother?
    • Do you understand you can do a lot of good with your children if you get them on the weekends, holidays, for the summer, etc.?
    • Do you understand that even if you gain custody, she can keep you in court for the rest of your childrens' childhoods trying to get custody back?
    • Have you not noticed that many couples do better by sharing custody and responsibility for their children and the children do better?

    I've seen couples who realize that it's not so bad sharing custody or the weekend/holiday/summer arrangements. They decide it's better to get along and work together, to be civil, even friendly to each other. The children have bedrooms at both houses and get to enjoy the best each fragment of their family has to offer.

    Fighting parents do not realize how quickly childhood passes. Then they are left looking back at all the energy, money and time they wasted battling each other, when they could have used those resources, passions and energies truly helping their children have the best childhood and family experience possible under the circumstances.

  • FlyingHighNow

    Something you don't realize now: it's exhausting getting kids ready for daycare centers, school, making lunches, making sure their homework is done, laundry is done, etc. If your wife has the children during the week, she is the one with all this responsibility.

    If you get them on the weekends, you get them when you are less tired. You get to do the fun things with them. You'll have more energy to focus on school projects, weekend camping trips and recreation.

    You can set up a joint custody arrangement where she cannot make the important decisions about medical care and where the children will go to school without you. So that you'll have the right to insist they be allowed to join the scouts, clubs, etc.

    I know people who don't have physical custody, but they welcome the break they get from the kids to regroup and enjoy them on the the weekends. I am telling you this because it could be a workable alternative you haven't considered.

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