I think I just broke the tele-market man

by whitman 22 Replies latest jw friends

  • whitman

    Well, today is one of those procrastinatey days, I'm at home alone with the cat who is dazzling me with her new tricks. So I got pretty excited when the tele-marketer man called to discuss a new and fantastic mobile phone deal. I managed to keep him on the phone for 32 minutes as I explained to him that I could only use a blue telephone due to a specific type of colour blindness that I have....which I do not have.... turns out they just don't make blue phones. He even suggested that I get a black one and paint it blue. I told him I couldn't paint it because I couldn't actually see it if it's black, so I wouldn't know where to put the paint brush. He suggested I get a friend to paint the black phone blue...and so it went for 32 minutes.

  • shamus100


    That was a good one! I can't stand telemarketers at all.

    Click on the link above - I nearly fell on the floor.

  • Hortensia

    ooooooh, you have a mean streak! Love it!

  • parakeet

    I just hang up. Fortunately, we don't get many telemarketing calls.

    However, I have a method of dealing with d2d salespeople (not dubs) that leaves them speechless. They're usually college kids trying to earn a little extra money for books and tuition. My son did that one summer -- it was the best motivator to keep him in college -- but he had one miserable summer, I can tell you.

    So this poor kid knocks on my door trying to sell me a vacuum cleaner for $50,000 or so. I interrupt him and tell him I'll be right back. The kid's getting excited, thinking he may actually make one sale for the summer. When I come back, I give him whatever cash I have in my wallet and tell him, "I have no intention of buying your vacuum cleaner, but I know it's tough trying to pay your way through college. Take this money and use it for books, tuition, or whatever you think best." The kid's jaw drops, the sales spiel ends abruptly, he takes the money, and wanders away.

    I've done this several times, and it works like a charm. I don't have to listen to the spiel; the kid gets some cash -- it's a win-win scenario.

  • dwtnphotog

    Parakeet, that i the best thing ever!

  • horrible life
    horrible life

    When my daughter was little, I used to tell them to hang on just a minute, I had something on the stove, I will be right back. Then I would give the phone to my 3 year old, who just loved to babble on and on. Sometimes it would take forever for them to hang up.

    With the police, or firefighters association calling, I found out, that these people are calling from other states, and the police etc, only receive about 10%.

    So one day, I decided to see how far they would go. I told them I had lost my job. And I could not pay this month. (I knew it was chairety, but pretended to think they were bill collectors, or something like that)

    Could you just give $35.00?
    No, but maybe after the first of the month, if my child support comes in. But he hasn't paid in 5 months.
    Could you at least send $25.00? Every little bit helps.
    I understand, ( I start to fake cry), but I just can't! I just don't have any money.
    Can I just put you down for at least $10.00, and I will send you an envelope. Everybody can afford 10 dollars.
    Sir, I am really sorry, I will try my best to pay you next month, but I can't even afford to have my children eat lunch at school. (almost sobbing)
    Ms W, I will let you go, I will call you next month, and see if you are ready to send a check. Good Bye.


  • Hortensia

    I have a friend who asks telemarketers for their credit card number. They ask why, she says time is money, it costs to talk to her.

    I have another friend who says "I am so glad you called. Please put me on your do not call list and have a wonderful day."

  • whitman

    Shamus - that must be one of the funniest phone pranks I've heard....hillarious.... mexican midget....hahaha ha oh dear... that's genius. I'm inspired to rig some type of recording device to the phone now....this could be my new thing... I've been looking for a new thing... no really, that's awesome...this day just keeps getting better and better...

    Parakeet - how sweet are you..helping the youngsters out without hurting their feelings... I imagine one day when they are all grown up and responsible members of society they will probably do the same thing when a youngster comes a-knocking on their door selling the latest gadgetry for a zero-gravity environment or some such thing high tech uber-modern thing from the future.

    H.L - Unbelievable indeed!! O the humanity!!! lol

  • CoonDawg
  • Junction-Guy

    Not so much with telemarketers, but with bill collectors I have had a blast witnessing to them. I usually tell them that I would have to consult with the Elders first. I tell them this several times throughout the conversation, then finally they get really mad and say "can't you make any decisions without the elders?" I then say "of course not !". I had one even ask me "what's wrong with you, why do you let the elders run your life?" I have to really hold back to keep from laughing.

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