^ Or they'll use a AD HOMINEM, by attacking me deliberately dodging question, which is my biggest fear out of this mess. Not that I can't handle myself when dealing with that tactic, but it'll put me place where no ones amicable, and loosing all respect for someone I held in high regard despite differences.
And couldn't agree more that no one needs to submit themselves to this interogation, becuase all that one needs as far as insight is available online/public regarding the WTBS publications, which is their Achilles' heel...
You are interested in a slow fade. Believe me when I say that this meeting has many different possibilities. You should however, not be concerned with their 'attack' on you. My first meeting with the Elder as I described was not a boxing match. Most Elders have never really dealt with the issues of people who no longer believe WTS teachings (i.e. apostates). You must remember this going into the discussion. Most likely he will view your doubts with surprise and then slowly begin to tell you the Watchtowers position on things.
That first conversation I had contained a lot of phrases such as "i had no idea", "you should have told me sooner", "the brothers will think this is apostasy", "i wasn't prepared to talk to you about this, your putting a lot on me right now", ect.
I would imagine this is how most Elders (who typically live in an intellectual bubble) will react, especially if they come alone. Don't think you are going into battle, especially if your desire is to fade. You already know you will prove very little to this person. Rather I would focus on showing your wife how reasonable you are willing to be, and then have this conversation. More than likely this Elder will want to follow up by brining another Elder. This is when the real pressure will begin. Make sure to get your wife onto your side before it begins. You don't have to convince her that the WTS is not the truth. Instead you should focus on how rigid they are and how little they accept any sort of intellectual diversity.
Also, stick to a few certain issues, do not let him dance around. I would stick with the idea that 'i'm having trouble believing that the stories about the divine origins of the society are true", or something random like that they are not used to defending. That's how I would do it. I also would not get into arguments about doctrine (such as the trinity, hellfire, ect). You could get around such things by simply saying you have no problem with those things generally, but that you really don't believe they prove that any of the stories that are told about the society (like in the revelation book) are true. I would say something along the lines that i'm simply having trouble seeing it as a divine movement as opposed to one that has simply naturally progressed over time. I know this is all way to much information to give out, but little bits of it here and there may be enough. I'm just trying to give you some possible ideas. One thing I wish I would have done is phrase my doubts in a way that is a lot less threatening.
I would say away from saying stuff like 'i can't believe that jehovah will kill everybody at armageddon'. Those conversations go nowhere!