Be Afraid JWs!!!! The SMURFS are back... in Live Action!!!

by Elsewhere 15 Replies latest jw friends

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  Elsewhere

  http://www.hecklerspray.com/the-smurfs-movie-it-isnt-a-cartoon-any-more-be-afraid/200814663.php#more-14663

  New ‘Smurfs’ Movie Will Be Live Action. Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid.

  June 10th, 2008 at 19:25 by Ian Dransfield

  Is nothing from our childhoods sacred?

  The prospect of a movie based on the ancient and well-regarded cartoon The Smurfs was hardly something that had filled us with joy.

  It made hecklerspray let out a trademark sigh as we looked forward to another summer of movies single-handedly decimating the best years of our lives.

  But this week the news suddenly became plain ridiculous, when it was revealed the upcoming Smurfs movie, apparently still in the works even though everyone had forgotten about it, will be - wait for it - live action.

  Live action with sprinklings of CGI!!! Like the recent Alvin and the Chipmunks movie.

  Oh dear!!! Apparently, as Variety reports, David Stern and David Weiss, the authors behind the last two installments of Shrek, are in talks to write the screenplay.

  So far, there is no word on who will direct it, when it will be released and what it will be about. But that is almost comforting.

  Now, you know we at the ’spray aren’t ones to bitch - far from it.

  In fact, we’re positive guiding lights of glory in the world today. But this has to rank among some of the most insane ideas ever. What in the (literal) blue hell are they going to do with it?

  Have tiny CGI Smurfs invading a human-populated locale? Are they going to use midgets? Is Lindsay Lohan going to put on a blue costume and slut it up with all the other blue horndogs?

  Time will tell.

  You see, what was originally meant to be a cartoon remake has turned into a live action, CGI affair. Both of these options are welcome when reviving a beloved creation, as long as due care and attention is paid to the source material.

  But part-CGI, part-live action smacks of either pending incredible failure or the chance to terrify a whole new generation.

  Tiny blue computer-generated men (and a girl) hanging around with people? Or just, well, blue people? The thought is too much for fragile minds to take on board.

  But at least it cannot be as terrifying as this, no matter how tight the Papa Smurf costume may be.
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  Gopher

  A whole new generation of JW urban legends are just waiting to be born!
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  BreakingAway

  The Smurfs:Showdown at Armageddon

  Having been banned from the Kingdom Hall ....the Smurfs are back..and they're pissed ! Be sure not to miss this exciting,action packed film as a group of JW's holes up in a suburban Kingdom Hall fighting for their very lives ! Will Papa Smurf be able to conjure enough magical spells and potions to contend with the vicious God of the Dubs ? See for yourselves ! You don't want to miss out.. The end is near !
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  Chameleon

  that thing is going to be retarded.

  first alvin & the chipmunks, and now this.
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  whitman

  Hmmm....I started to get more than a little concerned when Smurfs began appearing on Facebook - but now a movie?? I'm guessing it will be an 'Allen Smithy' production, but not before it scares little j.w's into surrendering their toys to be melted down by a flame thrower thingy. What? That didn't happen to you? Don't you know that if you just throw a smurf in the bin it will just climb out again - the only real way to destroy them is by flame. I'll never get that image out of my head....all blue and white melty scorched plastic. Tragic.
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  betweenworlds

  lol! This reminds me of this:

  Smurfs in 'The Seven Deadly Sins'

  http://youtube.com/watch?v=z-ijhCgX1Tk
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  brinjen

  Having been banned from the Kingdom Hall ....the Smurfs are back..and they're pissed ! Be sure not to miss this exciting,action packed film as a group of JW's holes up in a suburban Kingdom Hall fighting for their very lives ! Will Papa Smurf be able to conjure enough magical spells and potions to contend with the vicious God of the Dubs ? See for yourselves ! You don't want to miss out.. The end is near !

  That would make a brilliant plot for a werewolf game...
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  BreakingAway

  Having been banned from the Kingdom Hall ....the Smurfs are back..and they're pissed ! Be sure not to miss this exciting,action packed film as a group of JW's holes up in a suburban Kingdom Hall fighting for their very lives ! Will Papa Smurf be able to conjure enough magical spells and potions to contend with the vicious God of the Dubs ? See for yourselves ! You don't want to miss out.. The end is near !

  That would make a brilliant plot for a werewolf game...

  Thanks.I actually never played a "werewolf game" though.What does it involve ?
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  BreakingAway

  Hmmm....I started to get more than a little concerned when Smurfs began appearing on Facebook - but now a movie?? I'm guessing it will be an 'Allen Smithy' production, but not before it scares little j.w's into surrendering their toys to be melted down by a flame thrower thingy. What? That didn't happen to you? Don't you know that if you just throw a smurf in the bin it will just climb out again - the only real way to destroy them is by flame. I'll never get that image out of my head....all blue and white melty scorched plastic. Tragic.

  I remember when I started studying I heard a number of Witnesses talk about "burning stuff" and "this needs to be burned" and "that needs to be burned", etc. They seem obsessed with fire and destruction.I think it's absolutely horrible when I hear stories here about people having their Barbie's and other toys burned by their parents.It's just sick !
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  Witness 007

  The Axis of Evil -1.Satan

  2.Demons

  3.Smurfs

  4.Apostates

  5.Raymond Franz