Stories Of Wife Abuse In The Organization!

by new boy 25 Replies latest jw experiences

  • new boy
    new boy

    There are so many...

    I remember my exfather inlaw...Ben Regan, he was made an elder in Newport R.I and that's enough to make you doubt the whole holy spirit thing right there.

    I was sitting in his living room one Sunday and the phone rings...Some poor black sister just got the crap beat out of her and she was crying to him on the phone, she was looking for help.

    Ben said

    "Well you must have done something really bad to make him so mad at you...I know but...what you need to do is just have another beer and forget the whole thing"....good by.

    Thank God must women are not putting up with this anymore, from their husbands or religions that really don't care about them.

  • flipper

    NEW BOY - Wow ! Your ex-father in law was a little slice of hell, was he not ? ! Sadly , his type of justifying abuse in the organization was all too common. My sister suffered through husband abuse for 20 years till 1989- then finally got out !

    This jerk off witness guy she was married to also made obscene comments to their daughter at age 12 . He told their daughter she was too small in the breast area , and she would never get boobs ! A-hole ! Anyway, this creep cheated on my sister for years with other witness sisters at times, he was a heavy methamphetamine drug abuser- so he had violent mood swings. He would slam my sister into the wall, striking her at times, even with her young children hearing it from their rooms at night. And the ultimate insult- he was so rough to her when having sex - he would force himself inside her and actually " raped " her ripping up her vagina and private area where she never was able to be with another man all these years since their divorce ! Now - that is evil.

    And the elders " pearl of wisdom " advice to my sister while all this happened ? Same as what you stated, exact words verbatim, " Sister, you must have done something to really upset your husband to make him this mad . You need to work at being a better wife ! " Just about makes you want to puke sometimes. My sister has since the late 1980's dealt with post traumatic stress syndrome from that marriage, still goes to counseling, takes medication for depression, and just suffered a stroke at age 56 in February.

    My parents and I love her and try to help where we can - but if there is a God , how much bloodguilt will he ask back of those elders, do you think ? For not only my sister, but other poor women who have suffered this plight as well ? One can only imagine

  • cognac

    That's so awful...

    I was in an abusive marriage but the kh that I went to I must say the elders were incredibly loving towards me. I love them and there wives to this day and hope they find out the truth about the truth...

    Unfortunately, that's not the case in every hall. However, I do believe that era is moving towards it's end and people are not dealing with that crap as much as they did before...

  • XOCO

    That is so sad New Boy. i personally don't know of any spousal abuse in my hall... but then again i don't know what goes on behind closed doors.


  • Tired of the Hypocrisy
    Tired of the Hypocrisy

    My sister went through an abusive situation for about 15 years. She left him and the washtowel society. The elders would side with him on he rhaving to submit to his headSHIT, and to be quiet about it. I hate that fu**er and am glad he died of liver disease, bleeding from every place you can think of. I hope he burns in hell forever. The sonofabitch.

  • Alpaca

    Domestic violence is alive and well throughout the Borg.

    There was guy in my last/final congregation that had his wife so browbeaten that she was anorexic and looked like one of the holocost victims. They had two boys and he made the older boy such a nervous wreck that the kid, at the age of 10, was still pissing himself before he could get to the bathroom. What an asshole. She had an affair, which eventually led to their divorce. The irony was that I think she had the affair so that the marriage would end, but he forgave her, and then they couldn't make things work, so they both ended up single without being able to scripturally (Borg speak) remarry. What a crock!!!

    In another congregation that I attended, prior to the one just mentioned, a couple had a scam going to make money by being foster parents. The husband ended up beating one of the kids to death. He went off to prison and the wife, who did nothing to intervene, went on being a witness in good standing, when she must have known full well what was going on. Beating a kid to death doesn't just spontaneously happen without other behavior leading up to it. She had to have known that the husband was beating the shit out of the kids. Actually, now that I am thinking about it I think he beat her, too. I remember her coming to the KH onetime looking like she had been beaten about a week prior (the black eye was not fresh).

    Not a pleasant subject, but it needs to be aired.



  • Sirona

    An elder in a local congregation beat his wife and kids for years. He would stand the kids in the corner and beat them with a leather belt, then make them stand there for hours and hours.

    At the meetings the children had to sit quietly even when the meeting was finished (not play with other kids). This guy was not DF'd and noone asked any questions for years.....until he decided to commit adultery and run off with the other woman. Then he was DF for that.

    If he hadnt committed adultery he'd have still been an elder most likely.


  • nomoreguilt

    In 1984, we were attending a cong that had a lot of family members and old friends that made up the body of elders. An elder that I knew and had befriende from our last cong had moved into this cong about 6 months before we did. The elders dragged their feet in re-appointing him there, as they were all GOOD OLE BOYS. Anyways, the co forced them to re-appoint him, and this happened just before we moved to this cong.

    Well, we redeveloped the relationship we had with him and his wife. She was very attractive, blonde, blue eyed cute figure. He was very high profile , 6ft 2, well built and well chiseled. They were both very high maintenance. They had 3 kds, boy at the time was 10, daughter was 8 another son was 5.

    Well, what happened next no one saw coming. All of a sudden his wife and kids were GONE!!! MIA. It turned out that he had been physically and mentally abusing his wife all their married life. The lder son was beaten up regularly.

    Well, he finally went too far and beat her up and then kicked her when she was down on the floor. She packed up the kids and moved out west to her parents home. He was ONLY privately reproved and deleted as an elder. The GOOD OLE BOYS had a field day over that, told ya so kinda thingy.

    She divorced him and never came back to this state. A couple years later he got a worldy girlfriend and then he got DF'd over that. She was married and her husband commited suicide over her. The former elder brought his hotsy girl friend into the borg. He had never been re-appointed as he is still scripturally the husband of 2 wives, his ex has never remarried.

    There's alot more to this story but for confidentiality purposes I will remain silent.


  • helenhall

    Its alive and well in my congregation. Me, as long as I play the stepford wife, things are just peachy. I did try to talk to the elders once - complete waste of time and i will never talk to them again.

    my friend has put up with abuse for 25 years from her hubby. she finally plucked up courage to involve the elders, they listened to both sides and because she was brave enough to say it as it is, her reward? being removed as a pioneer for not respecting her husband.

  • DaCheech

    my father-in-law gets mentally and verbally abused by his wife daily. she leaves so many messages on his cell phone, that we cannot leave him one of our own!

    he'd rather work than be home

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