What to do with believing granparents?

Krystal

Hey everyone, this is a shout-out for ADVICE!! I have been DF'ed for 7 years... since then I have married and I now I have newborn daughter.

My parents and sibblings are all still in "the truth"... what should I do about letting them have a relationship with her?

They came by to visit her at my home, it was more than a little akward... anyone in this position that can offer some suggestions? I want my daughter to have grandparents but at the same time I don't want them teaching her their BULL!! Also, how do I put up with them? Can I really stand them only talking to me to "get at" my daughter?

*sigh*

Let me know what you think! I am open to any/all suggestions/advice!

Thanks!! :-)

real one

just tell them how you are raising your child and ask them not to impose their beliefs on her at a young age. she may be curious about their beliefs as she grows older and explain them to her, yourself.

real one

you are really blessed they still talk to you!

Krystal

Well... they don't really talk to me... this is the first time I have seen them in two years... since the last funeral!

They were only in the same room as me to see her...

AudeSapere

I was wondering what happened to you... Now I see a new avatar.

Congrats on the adorable baby!!

I got no advice on the parent thing, though. Hopefully someone will come along soon with suggestions.

-Aude.

carla

Easy, never, ever leave them alone with her, period. You can tell them you will not tolerate their attempts at indoctrination but they will try anyway. Set your boundries and be firm. Tell them ahead of time what the consequences will be if they violate your rules.There are countless elderly who are alone that would love to adopt a family and be grandparents. You are not limited by blood alone.

Scully

If the grandparents want to be part of your baby's life, then they have to include you too. If they are going to disrespect you by shunning you and excluding you, then they don't get to see the baby.

Don't allow unsupervised visits. Ever. They will exploit unsupervised visits and use the opportunities to take your baby to the Kingdom Hall and in Field Service™.

Real grandparents take their grandchildren to the movies, to the park, to the zoo, and other fun places. JW grandparents take their non-JW grandchildren to the Kingdom Hall and Assemblies.

Krystal

Aude - hey! yeah, life got a little crazy! Broke up with my ex finally! Had the guts to move out on my own... met a wonderful man who fufills and surpasses all my expectations! We got married in Aug 07 and had our first little girl, feb 07-08. :-)

Carla, thanks for the advice... I told my husband I wasn't too comfortable with them being alone with her... I don't know what they will tell her... I mean it must be confusing for a little kid to try and understand why mom doesn't talk to her mom?!!! At least she will have my husband's parents!

carla

ooops! Forgot! Congratulations on the wedding and the adorable baby! keep her safe.

Krystal

If the grandparents want to be part of your baby's life, then they have to include you too. If they are going to disrespect you by shunning you and excluding you, then they don't get to see the baby.

That is what bugs me... I mean they will sit in a room with me and make small talk but only to see her... aside from the religious differences my parents and I have unresolved issues to deal with that I have tried to approach them with and everytime they just ignore me! how can I let them back into my life when they are unwilling to deal with the past?

At the same time, I won't want to be the reason my child has no relationship with her grandparents... it is a real predicament!

What to do with believing granparents?

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