Wife Abuse

by ZeroZen 18 Replies latest social relationships

  • ZeroZen
    ZeroZen

    JWs from what Ive read seem to be very sexest they dont let women have a voice in the religion, and my friend said he was talking to a member and he said it is ok to hit and abuse your wife is this true?

  • BFD
    BFD
    JWs from what Ive read seem to be very sexest they dont let women have a voice in the religion

    I would say, true. (But what about the annointed later on?)

    my friend said he was talking to a member and he said it is ok to hit and abuse your wife is this true?

    Not, true.

    BFD

  • ZeroZen
    ZeroZen

    I should add "When your wife is out of line" its ok to hit her?

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    is it me or am I just paranoid. Lately I've seen a number of newbies starting topics with odd questions such as this most recent one.

  • VoidEater
    VoidEater

    No, it is not doctrine that a husband has the right to physically abuse his wife.

    I have heard about and seen incidents where this was true, and in two cases that come to mind the wife was told to "wait upon Jehovah" to put things right - stay with the husband, don't complain - so while it is not doctrine, it does happen and it does not seem to always get handled well.

    In another instance, my step grandfather was at times physically abusive to my grandmother and raped her at knifepoint within their marriage. She viewed it as a her responsibility to stay with her husband and "wait upon Jehovah" for things to get better.

  • flipper
    flipper

    ZERO ZEN- Your friend is wrong. It is NEVER O.K. to hit or abuse a woman - whether she is a Jehovah's Witness or not

  • AudeSapere
    AudeSapere
    he said it is ok to hit and abuse your wife is this true?

    Wow! So many people disagreed here. I am really surprised.

    And I beg to differ. My father beat his wife (my mother) and his kids (4 out of the 5 of us). He felt he was justified and was not reproved by the elder body. It was multiple police interventions and my mother's final restraining order that made him stop. Even in court, on the stand, my father vehemently stated his god-given right - his obligation - to keep his family in line with whatever disciplinary measures he deemed necessary.

    My father was a well-respected elder, even Presiding Overseer for a few years. When he stepped aside from his elder position following one of the police incidents, the PO announced from the platform that it was solely my dad's decision and against the wishes of the elder body.

    They wanted to him to remain as part of the elder body.

    My take: Wife beating is not explicitly condoned so to say"OK" is a bit strong. But "tolerated", "quietly accepted" and "understood" may be more accurate word choices to describe the situation.

    A surprising number of men (and women) in the org will argue that it's only OK if the woman did something to deserve it.

    One of my brothers still believes that.

    -Aude.

  • dinah
    dinah

    Quietly accepted, like Aude said.

    It's never preached from the platform that it is acceptable, but in private homes...... it just takes alot to prove an accusation because, just like with child abuse, there may not be two witnesses.

  • R.Crusoe
    R.Crusoe

    The issues are not about whether but about why!

    The reasons some do things they may regret or feel negative about are due to all manner of oppressive living and poor advise about how humans should treat each other and live together and respond in times of crisis such as when one has sex outside a relationship or flirts outside it!

    I have worked out my own strategy which no religion taught me!

    If my woman wants 5 men I say how about the six of us?

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    After being married to an abusive JW husband for almost 7 years, I have an answer for you. The official answer is, "No." It is preached constantly that a husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the congregation. The unofficial answer is, "Yes." My husband admitted that he abused me to elders in two different congregations in two different states. The conclusion was always the same; wait on Jehovah and to be a better wife. Thankfully, doctors and judges in two different states thought waiting on Jehovah might not be such a good idea, and they committed him against his will to a mental institution. I took the hint from the professionals and filed for divorce. I was disfellowshipped for my trouble, but he is in good standing. So, let's see here: he was the abuser but nothing was done to him by Jehovah or His organization, and the nut case can have contact with my JW mother if he so desires. I was the abused, but Jehovah and his organization saw fit to expel me and have no contact with my mother. Oh, by the way, for a good part of our marriage, I was a regular pioneer, while the nutcase couldn't seem to hold onto the simplest of "privelages" and held no title. So, it seems to me, that men are allowed to beat their wives as long as they are JW's. Thank God the "world" doesn't see it the same way.

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