i have a friend that was emotionally and physically abused by her jw hub

by looloo 8 Replies latest jw friends

  • looloo

    but she was told by an elder to put up and shut up as she had been told not to marry him in the first place , when she told her jw mum of the abuse, my friend was counselled for causing trouble in the congregation and in future not to discuss it with anyone !!!!!she stayed with him for years and carried on going to meetings despite not really believing it, then snapped and had an affair so that hub would divorce her , he didnt , so she started smoking and left him , and was disfellowshipped even though she had not attended a meeting for at least 7 months , hubby still did not want a divorce , but eventually did , i think it is so awfull that she was not shown compassion , i bet that elder wouldnt of expected his daughter to put up and shut up ! another elder did show compassion for her however and another elder didnt want to be involved in a domestic! where was the holy spirit directing the differentattitudes of these elders , on vacation perhaps ! did any of you have a similar situation ?

  • Tired of the Hypocrisy
    Tired of the Hypocrisy

    My Sissy went through almost an identical set of circumstances. The retarded bastard broke her back and raped her and their kids. He was a hypocritical turd that screamed that he was jehovah to the family, did drugs and boozed way too much, then nagged people for watching Rated-R movies. My Sissy finally left him and took the kids. She filed for divorce in another state and they all reported his rapings and abuse to the cops. He was caught a few weeks after my Sis left him in hte apartment of a disabled sister...NAKED. Fat, Lazy, Inbred, Stupid, Wanna - Be - In - Charge, Stinky, mis-shapen, ugly Maggot. He died a couple of years ago as the police were closing in on him. What I find even funnier is that he was broke when he died so the cong cremated him at their expense, then a few weeks later they found out he was about to be disfellowshipped in another hall. HA HA HA HA HA!!

  • jamiebowers

    Yes, I had a very similar sitution, I stayed married to a lunatic for about 7 years while enduring beatings and him terrorizing me with everything under the sun (including driving into oncoming traffic). I was a regular pioneer through most of it, but the elders counseled me to be a better wife, wait on Jehovah, etc., even though he repeatedly confessed his sins. When I filed for divorce, the elders told me that I would have to remain single until I could prove he had sexual relations with someone else (like I wanted to be around him in order to find out). I just wanted out and told them so, and I was disfellowshipped for it. I have heard stories from other JW women who were raped by a brother or physically and/or sexually abused by their husbands, fathers, etc., and nothing was done to the abusers but most of the women were disfellowshipped. That's how it goes with the WTB&TS.

  • cognac

    My first husband was abusive. The elders were actually really loving towards me and one begged me to leave and don't look back. I was the one who wouldn't... I felt that I had to stick around to get my evidence that he was cheating... Then, I wouldn't press any sort of charges against him. I felt it was wrong to hurt Jehovah's organizations good name. I did call the police once, when it was really bad, but that was it...

    Anyways, the one elder would even drive me around with his wife to try and help me to get my proof...

    He's no longer an elder. Stopped when I was going through my divorce or right before it. He couldn't handle it anymore...

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Count me in too.

    As with most kinds of abuse the WTS prefers insists on shoving the abuse under the carpet. Victims are gagged with threats of disfellowshipping.

    I too committed adultery to get away from my elder husband. And he generously offered to forgive me. There was no way I was going back.

  • jaguarbass

    where was the holy spirit directing the differentattitudes of these elders

    I think the holy spirit and God are resting after the big day of creating the earth and everything in it.

    But watch out when they awake!

  • ninja

    sure you have

  • flipper

    LOOLOO- My sister went through very similar things your friend did. She was married for 20 years to an abusive JW husband physically/emotionally abusive. He beat her , did drugs constantly, cheated on her with numerous women, destroyed her sexual organs in a painful way where she never wanted to have sex again with a man . Psychologically abused her, yelling , told her she was weak and worthless . What was the elders pearl of wisdom counsel ? " Sister so and so, you need to work at being a better supportive wife to your husband , he is obviously angry about something ! " I swear, there are times in this life I've considered going into some of these kingdom halls and doing a REAL cleaning out process in regards to some of these elders , and let me tell you, it would not be a pretty sight. That's how much anger I feel towards them in how they have damaged lives. I need a stiff drink just talking about it. I hope you still keep in touch with your friend helping her

  • Pioneer Spit...oh, i mean Spirit
    Pioneer Spit...oh, i mean Spirit

    My sister, 27yrs of marriage to similar maggot. Was further abused by our parents, sisters and friends for filing divorce and leaving him. 'Jehovah hates divorce' one sister shouted at her in a store. No support, no help, no where to live.

    He's still in good standing.

Share this