Pharasaical thinking....

by Pahpa 9 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • Pahpa
    Pahpa

    I know a number of parents who have left the organization and whose children refuse to have anything to do with them because of the disfellowshipping policy of the Watchtower Society. These children justify their position declaring that loyalty to Jehovah/Organization has priority over "honoring" one's parents.

    The striking similarity of this position to that of the Pharisees of Jesus' day can not be ignored. "But you say that if a man says to his father or mother: 'Whatever help you might other wise have received from me is Corban' (that is, a gift devoted to God) then you no longer let him do anything for his father or mother."

    The Temple and its arrangement was the "organization" of that day. But this did not erase the obligation of God's law for children to "honor your father and mother." However, one might try to rationalize otherwise, Jesus own words to the Pharisees should be warning: "They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men....Thus you nullify the word of God by your tradition you have handed down." (Mark 7;7-13)

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    The organization emphasizes organization over love and humanity. It's a sick religion that teaches children to shun their own parents.

    This ties in with the other "corban" thread from earlier today about how sick / elderly JW's in good standing are neglected.

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/153735/1.ashx

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow

    I thought that when your close family such as parents, siblings, children need you, it is okay to be there for them, just not on a spiritual basis. If a JW chooses to turn his/her back on his/her family when there is dire need, it's an individual choice. Some JW's choose to associate on a limited basis with their relatives that are not in good standing, especially when there is a medical need or business involved.

    I guess the scope and degree of shunning of immediate family members depends on the pressure of local JW leadership and the individual interpretation of and adherence to the RULES.

  • IP_SEC
    IP_SEC

    personally I see 'family/parents' as just humans with whom I happen to share some DNA, but, institutionalized shunning is like blowing the knee caps off of humanity.

  • Pahpa
    Pahpa

    FHN:

    There doesn't seem to be a consistent application of policy with regard to shunning parents. But it has been my observation that the more zealous one is for the organization the more severe is the treatment. But the Watchtower has made it clear that little or no contact should be made unless it involves "important family business." Some JWs read this as an escape clause and regularly visit their parents. But many interpret this as a rule to be observed and rigidly shun their parents.

    "Honoring" one's father and mother is fundamental in both the Old and New Testament. In Jesus' time, the Pharisees tried to make an exception by claiming loyalty to "God's organization" (the temple) invalidated the commandment. But, as already noted, Jesus condemned the practice and exposed it as "rules taught by men." This, in turn, made their worship in vain.

    The Watchtower and JWs find themselves in the same position as those Pharisees.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    I thought that when your close family such as parents, siblings, children need you, it is okay to be there for them, just not on a spiritual basis. If a JW chooses to turn his/her back on his/her family when there is dire need, it's an individual choice. Some JW's choose to associate on a limited basis with their relatives that are not in good standing, especially when there is a medical need or business involved.

    I guess the scope and degree of shunning of immediate family members depends on the pressure of local JW leadership and the individual interpretation of and adherence to the RULES.

    Good thoughts by FHN. Excellent answer by Pahpa:

    There doesn't seem to be a consistent application of policy with regard to shunning parents. But it has been my observation that the more zealous one is for the organization the more severe is the treatment. But the Watchtower has made it clear that little or no contact should be made unless it involves "important family business." Some JWs read this as an escape clause and regularly visit their parents. But many interpret this as a rule to be observed and rigidly shun their parents.

    The original thought here is that it is an obligation to "honor" your parents. That honor would include more
    than just being forced to deal with them because of dire need or family business. (By the way, "family business"
    is a term for "absolutely necessary contact" such as at the death of someone, or when dealing with wills and the
    possibility that the JW will be able to get some money out of it, other MAJOR disruptions of day-to-day life)

    The honor would come by visiting them, by checking on them, by informing them about your life and the life of
    their grandchildren, letting them see those grandchildren, and the big one- eating with them regardless of the fact
    that they are DF'ed.

    If some of you wonder why OTWO is bitter, it is stuff like this- family. I can't believe they kept blinders over my eyes
    to the terrible way they encourage treatment of family.
    Shun grandparents.
    Shun teenagers.
    Turn your spouse in for apostasy because they read a book or look at a website.
    Lay off your Bethelite "family" after 20 years because they are getting older and will cost money in healthcare.
    Skip real vacations with family to go to assemblies and conventions.
    Tell your kids not to go to college, but to have theocratic goals- maybe they can get laid off at Bethel in 20 years.

  • Pahpa
    Pahpa

    Gopher

    The only time that JWs made a real effort to visit members in nursing homes was when an article appeared that encouraged them to do so. Then, there would be a flurry of activity for a short time. But shortly thereafter, all was forgotten.

    I remember an elderly pioneer sister who had a stroke and was put into a nursing home. In spite of her years of service, very few members of the congregation made an effort to visit her. It seems that once you are no longer a contributing member to the Watchtower you are discarded. In another case, a very active sister became ill and housebound. The neglect by the congregation was even noted by her neighbors. These neighbors organized and regularly visited and brought food to her. But the question they wanted to know was "where is her minister and fellow members of her church?" The answer was too embarrassing: "They are knocking on doors and distributing Watchtower literature."

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    I find it absurd to shun family members solely because they are disfellowshipped. Siblings, parents, and children are affected by this. While they do make the case that disfellowshipped children living with parents should not be shunned, many people do minimize this. Self-righteous people are more likely to be super strict about this. And, if the parent is disfellowshipped, children will view that as the excuse to cut off contact with the parent.

    But, they will honor parents that do not deserve it. Parents should earn the honor if they are to receive it. Parents that are mean spirited toward their children should not be honored so long as they are mean-spirited. This includes parents that are too controlling of their children. It also includes any parents that force their children into incestuous situations, particularly if the children are then silenced or additional ostracism is added. If a parent is like that, then they should not be honored because to honor such parents would expose the children to further physical or emotional abuse.

    None of which has anything to do with the Watchtower rule. In fact, they have it backwards. Children who have been incestuously raped by parents are expected to shut up about it and continue honoring the abuser. The same goes for the parents that act with spite and contempt. But, let a loving parent get disfellowshipped, and the children are supposed to dishonor them, even if that parent got disfellowshipped for doctrinal matters or did not want their children to go through the abuse that the Watchtower Society imposed on them. Truly, they are doing things when not appropriate and refusing to do them when they are appropriate.

  • Spook
    Spook

    Unfortunately the bible contains both an inclusivist and an exclusivist tradition. All the good which religious people do is found within, and all the bad. None of the good is unique, but some of the bad is.

    You can't fight this belief without fighting bible literacy, or else we are just quibbling about exegesis and our own favorite trump scriptures. Not a problem if you're willing to reject the bible as well as the JW interpretation of it.

  • Maddie
    Maddie

    The honor would come by visiting them, by checking on them, by informing them about your life and the life of
    their grandchildren, letting them see those grandchildren, and the big one- eating with them regardless of the fact that they are DF'ed.

    OTWO - When I had been DF'd my son shunned me. He is an MS and quoted to me that it was a question of loyalty and held to it. For years I didn't know what was going on in his life and he didn't know what was happening to me, except when I wrote to him but he didn't answer. When I was reinstated things changed and I was overjoyed to have him back in my life because I love him dearly. It is still very painful for me when I think that he could shut me out of his life so easily and absolutely and believe that it was the right thing to do. I know it is cult mind control but can still feel resentful at times over it. What is worse is that it could happen all over again because I now know that the WT hasn't got the "Truth"and have told my son. At the moment he is still okay with me but I am expecting that to change - I could be wrong but doubt it. To have my own son deny me was a terrible thing to happen to me and it has scarred me. I don't think I will ever get over it entirely.

    Maddie

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