Have you come to grips with your mortality? Do Jw's ever?

by AK - Jeff 27 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  AK - Jeff

  In post-Jw life, it seems to me that acceptance of this basic fact of life, the reality that we will die, is a healthy thing to do. Yet, I believe that most Jw's cling to a hope that Armageddon will spare them death, even when they see death at the doors. They have never prepared themselves for the reality, and when it becomes inevitable, the pain of that realization must be intense for some of them.

  Great irony, their thinking. "Gee I hope Armageddon gets here soon, wipes out 6 or 7 billion people, makes blood flow as high as the fences so that I don't have to die." At least the churches don't generally hope that all of mankind will die so that they won't.

  How disappointing it must be to finally see death knocking, having never believed that the one inevitable of life would be eluded. Some of us xjws may struggle with our mortality at times due to deep indoctrination over many years or decades, but I believe it healthy when we finally come to grips with the reality.

  If for no other reason - this alone is enough to have made the pain of exit worth all that. Acceptance of the ultimate reality.

  Jeff
• 

  AudeSapere

  I believe it healthy when we finally come to grips with the reality.

  I agree. And it helps us see the value of the life we have now. Rather than take it for granted, make the most of the time we have right now.

  There is a greater sense of urgency to actual *live* life and not just watch it.

  -Aude.
• 

  erynw

  Yes, I have.
• 

  Hortensia

  I was raised 3rd generation JW. My grandparents believed they would live through Armageddon, my mother believed it too. Rather sad. My mother lost her parents, and a sister and a couple of brothers before she herself died. It was sad - because they all really believed they wouldn't die. However, I have to say, when it came down to the end, my mother was really brave and told the nurse to pull the plug - it was her choice. Once I got out of the org., I went through a lot of stages - denial - which took the form of exploring other religions hoping that one of them was the truth. I had to face two truths - one is that I will die, and the other is that this might be all there is. That's a hard pill to swallow, but it could be the truth. The solution: live life fully. Only, it isn't always easy - life sucks sometimes, in fact.
• 

  flipper

  Yes I have. I agree with Aude Sapere . We need to live our lives full of love in our hearts for family, friends and others , and for ourselves , because we never know what can happen down the road . I feel the witnesses specialized in living too much for the future paradise , and by so doing minimized the importance of paying attention to enjoying the here and now while we have it ! Make the best use of it . It's all we have ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
• 

  MissingLink

  Hortensia make a great point. It IS a 2 step thing to get over. 1) We WILL die and 2) Theres nothing else.

  I've never believed the end would come in my lifetime, so I've always accepted #1. But only recently I've had to face #2. My wife really has a problem with this. She does accept #1. Her father died over 10 years ago, but she's never really mourned him properly, because she's haning onto the hope of #2 and that she'll see him again. Even though he wasn't a witness, and according to the WTS he won't be coming back - she hopes that the GB might have got this one wrong.

  I don't know if it's intentional, but these beilefs make us devalue our current lives. They're only a few years full of nothing meaningfull, the good stuff is all to come in the future. So we never get any enjoyment out of life. I'm 37 and freaking out because of all of the time I've wasted in my life. I can't imaging coming to this realization at 60+. The other thing is that we never mourned our lossed loved ones. They're only sleeping. Lucky actually - they don't have to see the great tribulation. Only a few more months and we'll be reunited. I guess mourners aren't good salespeople on the ministry.
• 

  SirNose586

  I have. That invincible feeling that young men feel evaporated for me. When I first had my back problems in 2004, it chipped off a big part of that. When my eye trouble happened in 2007, it chipped off another part of it, and I'm still dealing with it.

  So I feel pretty mortal.

  I don't think JWs are allowed to properly accept the dying process...
• 

  Exterminator

  The communist party secretary of my work unit is a lady in her fourties. She narrowly survived breast cancer a few years ago. She's plainly aware of her mortality, and certainly has no religious belief of any sort. Yet, I know no one more cheerful and happier than she is. She's the sunshine of our unit. She once told me that what matters is not the length of our life, but what we do with it. This very simple truth helped me a lot to ajust to my new mortal after-JW life.

  If only religions had half the wisdom of atheist people
• 

  monophonic

  no, and i'll never. i'm pissed that right when things start to click, when artists, filmmakers, writers have so much more to say, they have to die.

  it's a lame ass situation and whoever or whatever has set us up like this, i'd like to pour gasoline on them and set them on fire....maybe i'll have a chance for at least a suckerpunch if there's an afterlife.

  or i'll be reincarnated into a cow in india and take a shit on a watchtower.

  oh, but i've come to grips with i'm going to grow old and die and there's no armageddon coming for god to murder billions of people so i can live in their houses b/c i preached.....my anger/frustration is beyond the jw belief system.

  if there's a god, i'm giving him the biggest wedgy if i ever meet him.

  life is one big cock-tease and i think people 'accept' their death when they reach old age b/c it's a pain in the ass to hurt and have messed up teeth and feel your whole body slow down. if they didn't feel that way, they'd be hanging on harder to life.
• 

  Gopher

  I don't think JW's come to grips with mortality. I didn't when I was one. And the behavior I've observed at memorial services when one of their members dies indicates that they want to deny the reality and finality of death.

  It took a while to overcome many feelings I had about death after leaving JW's, but it was necessary.

  Now that I know life is temporary, I am moved to make the most of each day, week and month. There will be no more putting off important goals or relationships.