How long does it take to "catch up" from the WTBTS stunting your growth?

by megsmomma 9 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  megsmomma

  Following my last thread about how being a JW stunts your mental growth,

  I was thinking f how many people here that have recently come out of the haze...and seem to be "caught up" on their mental abilities rather quickly. Does your mind catch up to your age as soon as the "flip switches"....or does it take time living in the "real world" for a while that does it?

  To me it seems that it took a while for me to "act my age"...but, I was still stuck in the JW mentality for years after I left. It seemed I was able to "grow up" soon after I realized that the borg warped my thinking.

  I would love to hear everyone's thoughts on this!!
• 

  dedpoet

  Personally, it didn't take me all that long, but I was only in 8
  years, between the ages of 40 and 48, so I'd had a life prior
  to the org, and picked up the threads again relatively easily.

  I left in November 1999, and I'd stopped using jw speak, apart
  from on forums like this one, within a few months. I stopped
  referring to it as the "truth" while I was still a jw - I knew it
  wasn't, having done my own research into the teachings.

  It took a while to get over the embarassment of allowing myself
  to be so thoroughly duped into joining a cult, but nowadays
  my years in the watchtower are really nothing more than a
  mainly unpleasant memory, and one that fades with every
  passing year.

  I guess it would be more difficult for those who leave having
  been raised as jws, and not having had a pre-cult life.
• 

  REBORNAGAIN

  It took me about 4 years after being DF to feel totally escaped. I think it depends too on what you take into your life afterwards, i.e. who you hang out with, what activities you take part in. The sooner you get exposed to the real wonderful world, the better. GO FOR IT...ASAP!

  LINDA
• 

  ex-nj-jw

  Well for me I was raised a JW but never really was a JW in my actions. I always hung out with non-JW friends and only occasionally would be around JW's. That is after I became a teenager, prior to that I didn' t have a choice and very rarely was with any friends JW or non.

  So I guess I was more mature than the average JW when I left. I still had some JWism's to get over, like thinking it was the Big A during thunderstorms. I really didn't know what to believe or not believe at first. But it took me no time to shake all of it!

  nj
• 

  WTWizard

  It depends on what area is in discussion. Spiritually, I know more about the Bible as an apostate now than I ever did, or ever would have, as either a Witless or a regular worldly person, and I know about the specious arguments that both the Bible and the Watchtower Society make to extort people into obedience to a higher cause.

  Socially, I think the Watchtower Society made an already bad situation and made it even worse. I probably think the windows of opportunities in this area have closed, and there is no way of getting totally caught up. Financially it's probably the same since the Tower made a bad but potentially correctable situation much worse than it needed to be. At least I was not born into this cult, nor was I raised in it from a very young age.
• 

  jaguarbass

  I totally agree that being a witness stunts your emotional growth.

  So lets say a witness has an emotional maturity level of 10.

  So it would take 10 years out of the organization to be like a 20 year old.

  So you could be a witness leave the organization at 50.

  And be acting like a 20 year old at 60.
• 

  Enjoying freedom

  I was brought up in the religion from the agoe of 4 and left when I was 24/25 years old.

  I have always been a strong minded (some say obstinate!!) person, so when I left I just walked away from it with no qualms. I have never been DFd (even though my BIL is the PO!).

  Since then I have been building up a career/qualifications that I should have done when I was in my late teens.

  I think the most difficult thing (for someone in my situation) is building up a set of real friends - obviously I didn't keep in touch with school friends because they were "worldly associates".

  Fortunately one of my very close friends who was also a JW was DFd a few years ago as well, so we have got that. And I have some excellent work colleagues that I would class as very good friends.
• 

  JK666

  6 years plus and still catching up, but getting closer.

  JK
• 

  nvrgnbk

  I'll tell you when I'm about to die.
• 

  greendawn

  This depends how long one has been in the cult the longer one was in the more difficult it is to disentangle from their ideology and mindset. It is also a matter of mental constitution, in the end some take months and others take years.