as per request, here is the story of bigdreaux and misanna's courtship. hope you enjoy. '
as i sat watching busload after busload of my fellow neighbors, flowing into the rest area, the reality of what was actually happening hit me. i had grieved for a few days. i myself had no home, thought i had no job, and was wearing a shirt and tie i bought at a goodwill store. it was the 3 a.m. shift, we were looking for witnesses coming in on buses from new orleans on their way to dallas after katrina. this nice older "sister" sat next to me. we started talking. i told her all about myself. we had a nice conversation. all the while, i kept eyeing this blonde hair angel walking around talking to people. the lady got up, and went and talked to her. they both kept shooting me glances. i was thinking, great, that's her daughter, and she's telling her i've been oogling her. i didn't care, there were more important things to deal with. meeting women was the last thing on my mind, for the first time in my life. lol
after a while, she finally sat next to me. her name was anna, and the instant i started talking to her, i knew she was special. when she got up to get a drink, and i asked her for one, she responded, "you can get it yourself" ahhhh, now i'm definately interested. this girl had spunk. i like that. she did get me a drink, and smiled as she handed it to me. it was a surreal moment. not 15 minutes earlier, i had lost all hope and was giving up on life.now, i had butterflies in my stomach. for those that know me, this is not typical behavior for me. i never let people get close to me that fast. espically back then, getting close to me was almost impossible. i had a wall up to the world. she has since broken me of that. so, we chatted with each other, and with some of the refugees. well, when it was time to go, i knew i just had to get her number. now, usually, i would just walk up, and ask, but, something made me nervous. this was a weird feeling for me. but, i thought, what the hell, faint hearts never win fair maidens. so, i walked up to her, next to a fountain. the morning sun was in her hair, and she was the most beautiful woman in the world. i felt we were the only 2 people alive at that moment. i swallowed hard, and managed to get out the words, can i call you sometime? yeah, i'm mister romantic, huh? lol she hesitated for a second. i thought, great, here it comes. then, she smiled and said, sure. i could hardley type the number into my phone i was so jittery. she walked away as i watched. i thought, if she turns around, i'll call her. sure enough, she shot a smile at me over her shoulder. a jolt went through me. i just stood there like an idiot, until the brother i was with jerked me back into reality asking if i wanted to go for pancakes.
i know all about the 2 day rule, but, we were having a "get together" i know some hate that term, at the house i was staying at. so, i called and invited her. to my joy, she said yes. i couldn't believe it. so, naturally, the day drug on. finally, she showed up with her sister. we hung out and talked the whole afternoon. from that day on, we would talk on the phone every night for hours. another thing that is out of character for me. but, i was addicted. i wound up getting a job transfer to dallas until the shop in new orleans re-opened. so, for the next few weeks, i moved in with a witness family in dallas, that the brother i was staying with knew. the witnesses i stayed with were awesome. i would cook dinner every night, and we'd sit around drinking and talking. they were really awesome people. they told me as long as i was willing to cook, i could stay as long as i wanted. well, that lasted a few weeks, until i got the call to go back home, my shop needed me back. so, i moved in with my dad. my mother and the rest of the family had settled down in dallas. i went home and helped my dad get the house fixed, and helped get my shop back up and running. eventually my dad moved to dallas, and i stayed home and rented the house from them. they had to get a loan for the new house, so, even today, i make the payments on that loan. i'm about to buy it outright though.
so, now missanna and i were having to deal with a long distance relationship. she started getting flack, because, she was a pioneer, 19 years old, and just out of high school. i didn't find this out until it was too late and i was already in love. i'm 30, and usually go for older women, but, when i talked to her, i had no idea she was only 19. when i found out, i thought long and hard, because, even to me, it was weird. but, i knew i loved her, and knew i'd make the biggest mistake of my life. so, between the age difference, and the fact that she was a pioneer, and it was apparent to everyone i wasn't "spiritual" we both started getting alot of flack from both of our families. eventually, after my family got to know her, they started to like her, so, it cooled on my end. my parents love her now.
sad to say, she wasn't so lucky. we started our relationship with her trying to get me to be stronger in the org. i was trying to get her out of it. i started to win, and, this led to her getting even more crap from her family. she grew up with emotional, sexual, and physical abuse and this was continuing. not the sexual abuse, that had stopped a while back, but, the verbal and emotional abuse at the hands of her family and others in the cong. were at an all time high. she eventually gave in, and broke up with me. out of the blue, just like that. i was devastated. she called me at work. i'll never forget it. i was shopping for an engagement ring the night before. it was late in the day, the sun was going down, and i was alone, working on a unit in the middle of the hurricane devastation. she calls, and tells me it's over, she cannot deal with the pressure anymore. when we hung up, i'll admit it, i cried. it was freezing cold, and i felt completly alone, and devastated. i had no friends or family in town to count on.
i knew she didn't really want to end it, and after i got over the shock, i called her, begging her to think about it. this, again is out of character for me. i had been with quiet a few women, and when it was over, i was like, oh well, what's next. not this time, i was cut deep emotionally. she agreed to think about it. she left her home and went out of town, to be with her sister. after a few days, she called me crying asking if i still wanted to get back together. she said, she knew when she broke up with me, she was making a mistake. i told her of course. so, now, all was right with the world again
her parents weren't giving up that easy. now, they really started to turn up the heat. the abuse factor was multiplied, elders were called in. i felt so bad i couldn't be there to help her, but, she stood her ground this time. this all came to a crescendo one night. while we were talking, her father kicked in the door, and started yelling at her. now, up until this point, i had held my tongue, trying to keep the peace, and make it as easy as possible for her. this was the last straw, i told her to put him on the phone. we tore into each other. i called him every name in the book, and threatened him with his very life if he didn't leave her alone. i know, that was wrong to do, but, i had enough, and was at a breaking point. i told him if he continued to abuse her, i would personally come up there and confront him, face to face, and i meant it.
he actually got scared. he knows how crazy i am. i told anna to pack what she could in the car, and i would put money in her bank account to drive down here. she started to pack. her mother calmed everyone down, and got her to stay. i knew this wouldn't last, and started looking for an apartment for her here. she had been here a few times and wanted to move here. not just because of me, but, she loved the city. so, needless to say, the peace didn't last, but, we were ready this time. she got the nerve up to pack up, and drive down here. i wanted her to have her own place because, she had never lived alone, and knew she'd need some space when she got here.
so, she drove from texas to here. i furnished her apartment, and found her a job. on a side note, she still has this job, and makes more than me now. when she got here, things calmed down. my parents got to know her, and fell in love with her also. they know we don't go to meetings, and have issues with the org. but, i think they are afraid to acknowledge it. i don't think they want to deal with any of the crap, because we are such a close family, i don't think they could shun us, but, i'm not making waves just yet. i asked her to marry me, which we did this past mardi gras. we went to dallas because of the long weekend, and my parents have a big house where we had everything. i had all the people closest to me there. anna's famliy chose not to come, but, my sisters and mother made up for that, and treated her like one of them.
things are really good now, we are financially stable, have a good relationship with my family in spite of the not going to meetings thing.
my mother tells me she's never seen me this happy, and i'd have to agree. and i give all the credit to the love of my life, missanna.
thanks for taking the time to read this.