How could I have been so naive and gullible!?

by Mincan 22 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Mincan

  I find out that the "sweetest" girl in the congregation is one of the biggest sluts in town! She was into me, and here I thought she was sincere in the truth and I never made a move, because I was honourable.

  I was so lock, stock, and barrel in this cult, so sincere, it makes me sick. I didn't realise how two-faced and fake everyone in it was until I left and now all the people out are hanging out with the people in!

  I told my friend "no more! I can't keep hearing how completely stupid and deceived I was!"

  Man I missed out big time... it will take me some time to catch up, and even to start catching up...
• 

  Funchback

  Yeah... it can be a bit of a shock sseing those things that you neglected to see before.

  For what it's worth, you should see if she'll break a lil somethin-somethin off for you now.
• 

  minu

  I feel your pain. I went through this phase also (i.e. feeling naive & gullible). After I was out, I learned so many things about everyone I thought I knew!
• 

  changeling

  Is this the same mincan who was sloppy drunk at the DC looking to score? Do you suffer from a split personality, or do you enjoy toying with us?

  changeling
• 

  free2think

  Me too, no i can see they really weren't true friends at all. I would call most if not all of my dubs 'friends' acquaintances. Now i see that they were really just shallow relationships with people who didnt have my best interests at heart and didn't truly care about me.

  Im sorry your hurting mincan

  ((((((hugs))))))
• 

  eclipse

  Mincan,

  I am not like the girl you are refering to, (promiscuous speaking) but I find myself feeling offended by your comment describing her as ''the biggest slut in town''.

  So, it's ok for you to go looking to score, but it's not ok for her to be sexually liberated?

  Are all women supposed to stay virginal, chaste and pure??

  I do not think you were niave and gullible, I think you simply assumed that because she was sweet, she was innocent as well. If I am wrong and she openly told everyone she was a virgin, then I take back my comment. But most girls do not openly announce that they are promiscuous either.

  And just because she showed an interest in you, does not mean she only wanted to have sex with you. Perhaps she really liked you?

  I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt because she is not here to defend herself.

  Try giving women more slack, if you are allowed to be a player, then women too should be allowed the same right.
• 

  Mincan

  Mincan,

  I am not like the girl you are refering to, (promiscuous speaking) but I find myself feeling offended by your comment describing her as ''the biggest slut in town''.

  So, it's ok for you to go looking to score, but it's not ok for her to be sexually liberated?

  Are all women supposed to stay virginal, chaste and pure??

  I do not think you were niave and gullible, I think you simply assumed that because she was sweet, she was innocent as well. If I am wrong and she openly told everyone she was a virgin, then I take back my comment. But most girls do not openly announce that they are promiscuous either.

  And just because she showed an interest in you, does not mean she only wanted to have sex with you. Perhaps she really liked you?

  I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt because she is not here to defend herself.

  Try giving women more slack, if you are allowed to be a player, then women too should be allowed the same right.

  It's fine that she go to score, did I say anything was wrong with that? No. What I said was that in the hall everyone called her "such a sweet girl" and a "nice girl" and she was on all the family parts in the service meeting as being a shining example for all the young girls to follow. That is the big deal, the two-faced ness and how I couldn't see past all these pretenses. All the teenagers in my hall but I had already had sex, been drunk, smoked pot, and done everything that I have only done in the past 3-4 months. I can't believe I was so naive and gullable that I couldn't see the charade for what it was. All my friends acted so witness like with me, and I would never have guessed....

  I'm sick of these people getting offended simply because they assume my meaning and really have no idea what I'm talking about. I don't care whether a girl is virgin and chaste, where was that said in my 3 or 4 sentence post?

  Is this the same mincan who was sloppy drunk at the DC looking to score? Do you suffer from a split personality, or do you enjoy toying with us?

  Yeah I'm the same person, what are you talking about? How am I being a split personality. People are usually more than they appear to be on the surface.
• 

  eclipse

  mincan, I didnt mean for you to get angry at my post...I wasn't upset when I wrote it..sorry you took it that way...I just disagreed with how you described her.

  ''slut'' is a very derogatory term, and it comes from men who feel that any woman who has many partners is automatically deserving of little or no respect.

  All I was saying is that just because she was sweet, (albeit living a double life), doesn't mean she couldn't be promiscuous...and all i said was that your mistake was assuming that because she appeared to be nice, you thought she was probably pure as well....

  I know it was a big shock to you, but as you get older, you'll learn to never judge a book by it's cover, and also, first impressions aren't always accurate...

  I'm sure other posters here have a bad first impression of you, but if they took the time to get to know you, they would probably see that you are a caring, intelligent young man. (not that they don't think that, just using an example)

  anyways, I wasn't busting your chops, just reminding you that looks can be deceiving...

  not trying to make more you cynical, just more realistic

  take care,

  -e
• 

  changeling

  I said that because in the DC post you did not give a flip about the "truth", in this new post you act like the religion actually mattered to you untill this girl let you down. You puzzle me. I feel maybe you post whatever pops in your head to try and get our attention. Being funny and clever is one thing but making things up is not. I beg your apologies if you are indeed "on the level". Maybe I'm just too jaded.

  For what it's worth, you are young. We all have our hearts broken and break hearts in our lifetime. It hurts, but we move on and grow from the experience. You'll be OK.

  changeling
• 

  Mincan

  I said that because in the DC post you did not give a flip about the "truth", in this new post you act like the religion actually mattered to you untill this girl let you down. You puzzle me. I feel maybe you post whatever pops in your head to try and get our attention. Being funny and clever is one thing but making things up is not. I beg your apologies if you are indeed "on the level". Maybe I'm just too jaded.

  For what it's worth, you are young. We all have our hearts broken and break hearts in our lifetime. It hurts, but we move on and grow from the experience. You'll be OK.

  I dont' give a flip about the troof. No, you got it all wrong, this girl didn't mean anything to me other than the fact that finding out the trith aabout her is like finding out how gullible and deceived I was about everything.

  I do post whatever comes into my head. This site it where I can vent some of my feelings on ex-JW matters to people who understand. I'm glad some people consider me funny, however, this is not integral to anything in my intentions. I believe a lot of you simply are too jaded, and I fear I may be becoming so myself.

  My heart has only been broken once, and sadly, it had nothing to do with personal love or this religion. All this is is intense inner turmoil and confusion, and quite a few other things.

  Peace!