I'm back (sort of)

by nonamegiven 13 Replies latest jw experiences

  • nonamegiven
    nonamegiven

    Mouthy and onthewayout, you both know I respect you so I take everything you said with genuine appreciation.

    I think I would agree with wayout that one should view porn to keep out of other women's pants had I never had this addiction. See, it all started as a very youg lad with the Sears ads that came with the Sunday paper. We're talking swimsuits and underwear here. Just like any addiction, it moved on and up (or down?). Today's fix won't be enough tomorrow. Tomorrow's fix won't be enough for next week. What I SHOULD have done is been striaght with my wife when we were dating, got help then and moved on with my life but I didn't. Now we have to live with what my addiction has brought.

    I would never leave mywife and kids, I love them too deeply. My wife is sincerely trying to work her way through this. I have talked to her about my religious issues and she says that she will not leave me for that. If she can work her way through what I've done we should be ok. The fact that she is willing to even try is more than I could ask of her and is a gift from her. She has read most or all my my posts here so she knows where I am. She even asked me what would be my decision (about the "truth) if I had to make one today. I thought about it and told her I would not be a JW if I had to make that decision now.

  • nonamegiven
    nonamegiven

    Mouthy and onthewayout, you both know I respect you so I take everything you said with genuine appreciation.

    I think I would agree with wayout that one should view porn to keep out of other women's pants had I never had this addiction. See, it all started as a very youg lad with the Sears ads that came with the Sunday paper. We're talking swimsuits and underwear here. Just like any addiction, it moved on and up (or down?). Today's fix won't be enough tomorrow. Tomorrow's fix won't be enough for next week. What I SHOULD have done is been striaght with my wife when we were dating, got help then and moved on with my life but I didn't. Now we have to live with what my addiction has brought.

    I would never leave mywife and kids, I love them too deeply. My wife is sincerely trying to work her way through this. I have talked to her about my religious issues and she says that she will not leave me for that. If she can work her way through what I've done we should be ok. The fact that she is willing to even try is more than I could ask of her and is a gift from her. She has read most or all my my posts here so she knows where I am. She even asked me what would be my decision (about the "truth) if I had to make one today. I thought about it and told her I would not be a JW if I had to make that decision now.

  • unique1
    unique1

    Keep up the therapy and good luck!!

  • writetoknow
    writetoknow

    We are told to confess our sins openly and pray for one another and get healed. Then we are to call the elders to pray over the sick person and God would raise him up. Many brothers and sister have gone by the way and into some really sad and bad stuff because they live in fear of telling the elders.

    When you associate with a group that every minor infraction is a big deal it makes it pretty clear if you have a real problem - what the out come will be. So JW's can't be healed they hid their problems and then get caught or worst they hurt other people. JW's must get professional help to be heal someone that will listen and not be shocked or judgmental. Some one that does not have an agenda to look good, that is, looking good is more important then a person spiritual life.

    It is easy to think that JW's are good association and that because you associate with them some of that will rub off. The truth is people that hid every weakness/sin (for fear of being exposed and reproved public) our very sick and perhaps that why you have some of the problems you do. Spiritual uncleaness is a bigger disease and more contagious then physical uncleanness but most witeness have not idea what that really means.

    God's holy spirit must work freely to heal and to protect his people would you say that most witness are really spiritual people or judgmental people? You see you can't have it both ways if your judgmental you can't also be spiritual..

    To forgive requires a spiritual person, then to heal we must also love and realize we too have as many sins and let us beware that we don't fall as well because we lack mercy. Our father said the rocks would cry out if we did not. People you may consider unclean my be the very people God used to heal you. It may be the only prayers he will listen too because they are from the heart out of love and faith for you.

    The issue now isn't about elders if they show mercy or minister too you. Because they can't they haven't been able since the 70's to be an elder requires comformative to a greater degree to the organsation and their rules. Those rules prohibit them from doing so. You must accept that fact and not waste engery or time hoping they will change. Your wife is also a product of the teaching and from personal experience they have only one button they can't forgive unconditionally because JW's don't allow for that kind of thought. You will have to pay off your sin inch at a time for the rest of your life. They will never forget they can't that how they protect themselve and thier self - righteousness.

    But dear friend remember Christ will help you and his love will cover your sins. Yes, seek help prayerfully but be perpared that it will not come through the channel you think it should. So called worldly people or people from other faith will have more compassion on you. And perhaps like most of us you well not want to accept it - it appears to weak. But it is enough for a weak things of God is far greater then then the strong things of men.

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