Advice badly needed: Just how bad is baptism?

by Open mind 26 Replies latest members private

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  Warlock

  Just how bad is baptism?

  Depends on how long they hold you down in the water.

  Warlock
• 

  Open mind

  Quandry:

  Slow but sure wins the race.

  Purplesofa:

  How old was Jesus when he was baptised?

  What was good enough for him......good enough for my kids

  Thank you both. Good advice. I think I was just having a really bad, "Oh no, it's all going to hell" panic attack.

  Mary:

  Do whatever you can to get those kids out of that f***ing religion.

  C'mon don't hold back. Tell me what you really think! (See I think I'm feeling better already)

  Seriously Mary, I always appreciate your tell it like it is approach. Thanks for the "down the road" example as well.

  Warlock:

  Depends on how long they hold you down in the water.

  You are too funny.

  Thanks everyone.

  Open Mind
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  Xena

  He is better off not getting baptised, less pressure all the way around. Unbaptized people get a lot more leway. Work the Jesus was 33 angle.
• 

  blondie

  Just remember if you can get baptized, you can be df'd. Is your child ready to be shunned and avoided by every JW they know?

  Drive a vehicle--16 years old with parents permission

  Drink alcohol--21 years old

  Vote--18 years old

  Sign a contract--18 years old and financially solvent

  Marriage--16 years old with parental permission (18 years old)
• 

  jgnat

  If I were you, agree with him that he has made a valid argument. I can't tell you how empowering it is to be RIGHT at that age. Remember, he's got six years of major developing and independence going on, and I am betting that TIME is all he is going to need to decide to walk away.

  On the other hand, if you FORBID, then baptism joins that sacred list of FORBIDDEN THINGS that nearly all teens need to try at least once. (Booze, cigarettes, stay up 'till dawn on a school night, drivewithoutinsurance, (add your own horror list).
• 

  Who are you?

  Open Mind....I'm not intending to insult you by saying this. It is just something I learned raising two boys. You are the father, not him. You are the one giving direction, not him. Here's the deal with my kids, I'll cut them a certain amount of slack, but when they graduate from college with their degrees, then they can make their major life's decisions. At that time they will be in the early twenties and will have busted their ass in school to get that degree. After putting in all of that hard work and having a solid career in front of them, then they can make that decision.

  Being baptized doesn't pay the bills. Having a college degree pays the bills. Priorities are important. As the father, its up to you to set the correct priorities for your son.
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  Mrs Smith

  What makes 18 the magic year? How different is 18 to 16 or 17? It's still far too young to make a commitment that will affect you for the rest of your life. Jesus was 30 when he got baptised. Your kids should know the whole truth about WBTS and not the fluff they get from the KH. If they still want to go ahead after they have been informed then it's their choice but you as legal parent should guide and mentor them. Let the wait, the longer they wait the better.
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  Open mind

  Thanks everyone for sharing your perspectives.

  I think I was just really in a funk yesterday when I realized that my son's assessment of "how things really are" is that baptism is ultimately inevitable if you don't want to be the family pariah.

  A two-hour bike ride after work with some good tunes helped out tremendously. I'm not a big bumper sticker religion guy, but at the end of my ride I saw a bumper sticker that made me smile:

  "I BELIEVE IN LIFE BEFORE DEATH".

  It was a perfect end to a beautiful ride.

  I think the key to zero in on is that this is a decision that the Borg says is for ALL ETERNITY and that once you make it, you can't decide to play by different rules without HUGE repercussions.

  I'll also try to get some mileage out of the "Jesus was 30 argument", although I think that can be easily shot down if you follow the BORG's line of reasoning re: age of accountability, blah, blah. Hopefully my kids won't get that studious on this particular issue.

  Any thoughts on my "Jack JW" assessment of many young couples in "da troof" today?

  Thanks again for all the slaps to the head yesterday. I really needed them. Feeling much better today.

  Open Mind
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  drew sagan

  Well, the real problem with JW baptism is not the baptism itself but instead it is the rules and regulations that baptism brings you under.

  I'm a big fan of telling the truth as much as possible instead of just making stuff up. You may simply want to go the route of explaining some of the rules, regulations, and punishments that will go along with that baptism. You can even draw a comparison to what JW baptism is with the baptism as shown in the Bible. By simply explaining all of the things that happen when your are baptized as a JW (especially those negative things they like to hide) your son may begin to see why it baptism is not all what they make it out to be.
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  Crumpet

  Great thread! All that I was going to say got covered - just like being at the watchtower study and getting asked to comment after all the grown ups - LOL!

  Maybe you have to try and think of the questions your kidfs are likely to come up with in advance so you have good answers ready. Reminding your son jesus was in his 30s would be a great example.

  Like BFD I was 13 and had no idea that it woulde result in complete severance from my family for the rest of my life just three years after i did it.