I thought this article was worth sharing:
"When I remember how many of us are affected (by loved ones still in cults), I realize that my hope has many objects. I hope that my granddaughter will one day leave. Indeed, there are signs that she, like many children raised in cults, is rebelling against the system in which she grew up and is reaching toward the outside world.
I hope that young people will continue to be warned about cults and psychological manipulation by teachers and clergy – and you.
I hope that more mental health professionals and clergy will learn about cults and how to help families and former members. I hope that cult researchers will develop more practical materials for families and former members, so that more people can learn how to fight subtlety with greater subtlety. I hope that more workshops and conferences for families and former members will take place so that more and more people can make the personal connections that are so vital to fully understanding this field.
These are not vain hopes! These are hopes that will be realized. You and others who will come along in years to come will bring these hopes to fruition. Of this I am sure. The fall of the Soviet Union shows that lies, even when they have the power of the state behind them, cannot survive indefinitely. Truth doesn’t go away.
But what about my son? My hope concerning my son resides not in what I know, but in what I don’t know. All that I know about his group and his relationship to the group leads me to the conclusion that he will never come out. But I also know from my work in this field that every day long-term cult members walk out of their groups – sneak out in many cases. Virtually every AFF ex-member workshop, for example, has at least one person who had been in a group for 20 years or more. Most of these long-term members leave without their family’s pursuing an intervention.
They leave because they are burned out by the work demands.
They leave because the weight of inconsistency, contradiction, and hypocrisy becomes more than they can bear.
They leave because they are pressured to abuse their children, a command to which they are finally able to say "no."
They leave because they begin to question or dissent and are thrown out of the group.
They leave because the leader’s repeated false predictions about the future become too hard to rationalize away.
They leave for a myriad of reasons that have nothing to do with what their families do or say.
Indeed, their families often don’t have a clue about what is going on. One day their loved one is in; another day he or she is out.
I hope that I live long enough to see my son leave his group, or at least to see my granddaughter renounce the group. But even if I don’t, my hope will outlive my breath. I know that my son is still there, buried underneath the rubble that the cult has convinced him is spiritual superiority. He can be awakened. I have seen it happen to others. So I will not stop hoping."
http://www.csj.org/infoserv_articles/langone_michael_arthoping.htm